North Korea Isn't A Problem Just For Us

Crazy little fat boy Kim Jong-un, when he isn't pulling the wings off flies and murdering his relatives, is a constant annoyance to South Korea, Japan, and the United States. Nobody expects that his bluster about destroying those three countries is anything other than the masturbatory fantasies of a lunatic, but he does command a small arsenal of nuclear weapons, and has delivery vehicles that sometimes don't explode in mid-flight, so he is a threat.

Will he win a war? Of course not, but his killing possibly millions of people in South Korea or Japan before he loses is not an outcome that the free world relishes.

Luckily he seems to be a giant pain in the ass to China, and this article lays out the issues fairly well. China: Those Troublesome Koreans

China is increasingly angry at Koreans in general for not showing sufficient respect. The biggest (and growing) problem is North Korea. China wants a stable communist dictatorship in North Korea, not a failed government that would send several million starving refugees fleeing across the border. China also does not want North Korea to collapse and get absorbed by South Korea. That would put a democracy on China's border and give many Chinese a view of how things might be much better with a different political system in China. Koreans are seen as "younger brothers" to China, and it's embarrassing if the younger brother outdoes his older sibling. South Korean democracy is played down in China, but that would be difficult if a democratic, united, Korea were right on the border.

We have batted around the many possible solutions to The Kim Jong-un Situation, and my personal favorite is a quick and painless Chinese bullet in his head, followed by a benevolent dictator firmly controlled by Beijing.

[I think I saw this article on Notorious MWR's Twitter feed...]

[Addendum]And here is MWR's commentary, which is annoyingly better and more interesting than mine:

"I've said it before and I'll say it again: Kim Jong Un is a frigging Millennial. Think about that for a minute.

Picture Shrieking Yale Girl from a couple years ago, the one who had the profane hissy fit over Halloween costumes.

Now take her mentality - privileged, entitled, demanding respect while offering none in return - and give her a bad hair cut missiles.

That is Kim Jong Un."

He is a Millennial both literally (he was born in 1984) and mentally, with the added "bonus" that he doesn't just have unearned privilege, he legitimately has NEVER had anyone call him on his shit in any lasting way.

Kim Jong Un is what you get if the Mizzou students of the world take over the reins of power.

Be fricking scared, people.

posted by CBD at 12:30 PM

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