"Hillary's Bitter Tears" Drink Recipes Thread

MAGA asked about how to make a drink called Hillary's Bitter Tears.

Zombie offered the first recipe:

Hillary's Bitter Tears

2 jiggers absinthe (wormwood liqueur)
1 jigger grapefruit shrub
1 jigger 180-proof gin
Angostura bitters
Celery bitters
tears from an old sow

combine all ingredients in a pewter goblet. Do not stir. Drink while weeping.

Here's another one:

Hillary's Bitter Tears

18 parts vodka. Any kind of vodka. VODKA!
3 parts Binaca to disguise the vodka smell
4 more parts vodka
Pulped Whitewater Billing records
a few more parts of vodka in case you were drunk before and miscounted
Three drops of BleachBit extract
Olives pre-soaked in vodka. Squeeze the vodka out of the olives into the drink, then throw away the olives.

Rub the drink's lip with the dried genetic material of a former US president recovered from a befouled cloth. Then wipe that genetic material off the lip because, eww. Man-stuff.

Pour into a large empty "Energy Drink" can and pretend you're just getting you're caffeine on because all the Millennials will think that's cool or whatever.

Serve chilled with Provigil and an epipen filled with Armour Thyroid.

posted by Ace at 04:30 PM

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