Intermarkets' Privacy Policy Support
Donate to Ace of Spades HQ! Contact
Ace:aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com Buck: buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com CBD: cbd at cutjibnewsletter.com joe mannix: mannix2024 at proton.me MisHum: petmorons at gee mail.com J.J. Sefton: sefton at cutjibnewsletter.com Recent Entries
Monday Overnight Open Thread - January 20, 2025 [Doof]
Invasion of the Apple Snatchers Cafe At Last Night's Rally, Trump Was Joined on the Stage By His Strongest Totally-Not-Gay Supporters Quick Hits Surprise: Defender of Normzzz and Protector of the Criminal FBI Pardons Terrorist Who Murdered Two FBI Agents Quick Update on "Team DeLulu" Cope Border Patrol Trucks Are En Route to the Southern Border Elections Have Consequences: The TSA Official Who Put Tulsi Gabbard on the Terrorist Watch List Has Been Fired The Inaugural Ceremonies, Continued "A Revolution of Common Sense:" Trump's Inaugural Address "For Americans, January 20, 2025 is Liberation Day." Absent Friends
Bandersnatch 2024
GnuBreed 2024 Captain Hate 2023 moon_over_vermont 2023 westminsterdogshow 2023 Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022 Dave In Texas 2022 Jesse in D.C. 2022 OregonMuse 2022 redc1c4 2021 Tami 2021 Chavez the Hugo 2020 Ibguy 2020 Rickl 2019 Joffen 2014 AoSHQ Writers Group
A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published.
Contact OrangeEnt for info:
maildrop62 at proton dot me Cutting The Cord And Email Security
Moron Meet-Ups
|
« Ace of Spades Pet Thread [Mis. Hum.] |
Main
| Open Thread [CBD] »
August 20, 2016
Saturday Afternoon Chess/Open Thread 05-20-2016 [OregonMuse]Good afternoon morons and moronettes, and welcome to the Saturday Afternoon Chess/Open Thread, the only AoSHQ thread with content specifically for all of us chess nerds who pay homage in the temple of Caïssa, goddess light squares and heavy pieces. And, for those of you who aren't nerdly enough for chess, you can use this thread to talk about checkers, or politics, or whatever you wish, only please try to keep it civil. Nobody wants to get into a food fight on a hot Saturday afternoon. It's nearly 100 here today.
In response to 19.Nd4, Black played 19...Kh8. Not a good move. Hint: A single move COMPLETELY DESTROYS Black FEN: [r2q1r1k/pp2b1pp/2p1p3/3nP3/3N2Q1/7P/PPPN1P2/R3K2R w KQ - 0 20] Problem 2 - White To Play Hint: White mates in 3 This is actually a position from a very famous game. Guess which one. FEN: [r1b1k1nr/p2p1ppp/n2B4/1p1NPN1P/6P1/3P1Q2/P1P1K3/q5b1 w kq - 0 1]
Getting into serious chess again after a 20 year layoff, I've been surprised at all the new openings that have sprung up like toadstools after a rain. In fact, it seems that you can just choose 3-4 random opening moves and you'll find that (a) is an actual opening, (b) it has a name, and (c) there's a body of analysis supporting it. It's like you can make a game out of practically any opening. Except for this one: 1.e4 e5
FEN: [rnbqkbnr/pppp2pp/5p2/4p3/4P3/5N2/PPPP1PPP/RNBQKB1R w KQkq - 0 3] It's not uncommon to see noobs make this move. But it's literally the worst move on the board. It doesn't develop a piece or attack the center or free up pieces for development (as does 1.e4 or 1.e4), and in fact, accomplishes nothing except create an all but fatal weakness on f7. The f7 square is already the weakest square on the board when the game starts out, and 2...f6 just weakens it further. In fact, it is so weak that White is now justified launching an attack even though he's only got one piece developed. 3.Nxe5 fxe5 Black really shouldn't compound his error by taking the knight. In his classic study Chess Master vs. Chess Amateur, Euwe instead suggests 3...Qe7 4.Nf3 Qxe4+ 5.Be2 Nc6 6.O-O d5 7.Re1 is better. White's threat is now 8...Bb5, so Black will have to spend a tempo moving his queen to a safe haven. White's attack has been abated -- somewhat. You can find examples of Black winning from this position, but, really, why should you even go here to begin with? There are better opening novelties you can use. But of course, noobs can't resist grabbing the knight, after which White wraps up the game in short order: 4.Qh5+ Ke7 So, does this opening has a name? As a matter of fact, it does. It's called "Damiano's Defense", named after Pedro Damiano, who is the same guy who gave us "Damiano's mate" I discussed last week. No, Damiano did not think this line was good. Just the opposite is true. In 1512, Damiano published a book with a very long title that starts out "Questo Libro e da Imparare Giocare a Scacchi...", which, when translated, basically boils down to "Learn to Play Chess". He analyzed several opening lines, including this one, and concluding that it was inferior. And then History played a very mean trick on him: History: Damiano, you magnificent bastard. I read your book. Damiano: You did? What did you think? History: Oh, you're got some good stuff in here. Really good. Especially the bit about the "1.e4 e5 2.Nf3 f6" line. Damiano: Oh, yeah, that. You don't ever want to play it. History: You know, you're the first guy to publish an analysis of this line. Perhaps we should call it "Damiano's Defense" Damiano: What? No! It isn't *my* defense, I'm just saying not to play it. It's bad. It sucks. It stinks worse than a Genovese stevedore's armpit. History: Alrighty then, "Damiano's Defense" it is. Damiano: D'oh! ( *facepalm* ) So that's why it's known as "Damiano's Defense" to this day. And here's a problem from Damiano. It's White to play: FEN: [kr5r/p7/8/8/4q3/8/1R3Q2/KR6 w - - 0 1]
Hint: Simplification is your friend It's White to play and win. How can he achieve a winning position? Note: you don't have to map out every move to checkmate, just get to the point where you can confidently say "this is a won position for White." FEN: [8/7p/8/8/6P1/2KQ4/1P5q/4k3 w - - 0 1]
Amusing piece here, 55 Famous People That Play Chess. What makes it interesting is that each celebrity is listed with an approximate rating. According to these ratings, I think I could beat David Letterman and Marlon Brando easily, could play Nicholas Cage, Alan Alda and Henry Kissinger even, would have a tough time against Ray Charles, Cleveland Amory, and Alistair Cooke. I would have no chance against the rat bastard commies Che Guevara, Fidel Castro, Vladimir Lenin, and Art Buchwald. And Marcel Duchamp? Just fuggeddaboutit. And, at one point, Madonna also played a bit of chess: Chess is also being played by other people with one name, Bono and Sting...Madonna plays at the Bel Air chess club along with Tim Robbins, Susan Sarandon and Julia Roberts. Of course, at one time, Madonna was going around talking with a fake British accent, so there's that.
White wins; how does he do it? Hint: The position of Black's king is extremely sub-optimal FEN: [5N2/p4n1P/k4p2/P3p3/1K4p1/8/8/8 w - - 0 1]
Solutions Update: Problem 1 - White To Play 20.Nxe6! sets up a knight fork on Black's queen and rook. But that's not all it does. I hope you all saw that, in addition to that, it also sets up the mating threat 21.Qxg7#. Knight forks are always fun, but this one has the added value of the mating threat. Black is now in a resignable position. In fact, he did resign.
This is the final few moves of the famous game Anderssen-Kieseritsky, London, 1851, which has been dubbed the "Immortal" game. You can play through at the entire game here. Anderssen could play like a crazy man. He reminds me of one of those nutty used car dealers, MY COMBINATIONS ARE INSANE!!! In order to get this position, Anderssen had sacrified both his rooks. And he wasn't through, yet. 1.Nxg7+ Kd8 Nothing like sac'ing your queen! 3.Be7# Or 2...Ne7 3.Qxe7# works, too. Here's a possible alternate path to checkmate, but it's longer, and I don't think it's forced: 1.Nf6+ Nxf6
1.Qxa7+ Kxa7
White thinks: "You know, if those queens were off the board, I'd have a won game. There's no way Black will be able to stop my b-pawn." So, is there any way White can force a trade of queens? Yes: 1.Qb1+ Kf2 Black won't have time to remove the obstructing g-pawn and advance his h-pawn. Of course, you've got to be careful how you do this. I've thought I had won games so I forced the simplification and it turned out that I had overlooked something and so my "won" game wasn't so won after all. Oops.
The first thing to notice about this position is that Black has three connected, unopposed pawns and there's no way White can catch any of them in time. But White is not lost: Black's king is not in a really good position, i.e. there's only one square it can move to (b7) if it gets attacked. So White should immediately start looking for ways to bring his knight over. Also, White has an advanced pawn of his own and in order to prevent it from queening, Black's knight is required to stay put exactly where it is on f7, and not move. There are two possibilities for a White knight move, to e6 or d7. If 1.Nd7, then Black moves 1...Kb7 and White can pretty much hang it up. The other option, 1.Ne6, is better, because if Black tries to break containment with 1...Kb7, then 2.Nd8+! and here is something you don't see every day, a knight fork on a king and other knight. And Black cannot capture the knight, as that will allow White to queen his h-pawn. So with 1.Ne6! there are two threads to this problem: Thread A: 1.Ne6 g3 (or 1...f5 or 1...e4) Thread B: 1...Kb7
Note: that cryptic line of letters and numbers you see underneath each board diagram is a representation of the position in what is known as "Forsyth-Edwards Notation", or F.E.N. It's actually readable by humans. Most computer applications nowadays can read FEN, so those of you who may want to study the position, you can copy the line of FEN and paste into your chess app and it should automatically recreate the position on its display board. ___________ So that about wraps it up for this week. Chess thread tips, suggestions, bribes, rumors, threats, and insults may be sent to my yahoo address: OregonMuse little-a-in-a-circle yahoo dott com. | Recent Comments
JackStraw:
"If Trump was a real president he would volunteer H ..."
Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ : " 513 And why do I have to listen to Metallica on M ..." Cheri: "581 - just his part. The rest had to be better. ..." Miklos McMiklos, of the Auld and Ancient Clan McMiklos: "Raising a glass to morons present and departed, pl ..." Jane D'oh: "Come on, Trump. An eager nation waits to see what ..." nurse ratched, garbage: "Didn't one of MLK's daughters endorse Trump? ..." Martini Farmer: "The majority of federal employees spend their time ..." Diogenes: "Damn...was it that bad? Posted by: eleven at Janu ..." Pug Mahon, Day 7 of Funemployment: "I pretty much stopped watching the inaugural stuff ..." bluebell: "Sheesh. More blathering. ..." Alberta Oil Peon: "I haven't been there, but there is a place in Flat ..." Axeman: "Liberty Ball is best. Posted by: Boss Moss at Jan ..." Recent Entries
Monday Overnight Open Thread - January 20, 2025 [Doof]
Invasion of the Apple Snatchers Cafe At Last Night's Rally, Trump Was Joined on the Stage By His Strongest Totally-Not-Gay Supporters Quick Hits Surprise: Defender of Normzzz and Protector of the Criminal FBI Pardons Terrorist Who Murdered Two FBI Agents Quick Update on "Team DeLulu" Cope Border Patrol Trucks Are En Route to the Southern Border Elections Have Consequences: The TSA Official Who Put Tulsi Gabbard on the Terrorist Watch List Has Been Fired The Inaugural Ceremonies, Continued "A Revolution of Common Sense:" Trump's Inaugural Address "For Americans, January 20, 2025 is Liberation Day." Search
Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Primary Document: The Audio
Paul Anka Haiku Contest Announcement Integrity SAT's: Entrance Exam for Paul Anka's Band AllahPundit's Paul Anka 45's Collection AnkaPundit: Paul Anka Takes Over the Site for a Weekend (Continues through to Monday's postings) George Bush Slices Don Rumsfeld Like an F*ckin' Hammer Top Top Tens
Democratic Forays into Erotica New Shows On Gore's DNC/MTV Network Nicknames for Potatoes, By People Who Really Hate Potatoes Star Wars Euphemisms for Self-Abuse Signs You're at an Iraqi "Wedding Party" Signs Your Clown Has Gone Bad Signs That You, Geroge Michael, Should Probably Just Give It Up Signs of Hip-Hop Influence on John Kerry NYT Headlines Spinning Bush's Jobs Boom Things People Are More Likely to Say Than "Did You Hear What Al Franken Said Yesterday?" Signs that Paul Krugman Has Lost His Frickin' Mind All-Time Best NBA Players, According to Senator Robert Byrd Other Bad Things About the Jews, According to the Koran Signs That David Letterman Just Doesn't Care Anymore Examples of Bob Kerrey's Insufferable Racial Jackassery Signs Andy Rooney Is Going Senile Other Judgments Dick Clarke Made About Condi Rice Based on Her Appearance Collective Names for Groups of People John Kerry's Other Vietnam Super-Pets Cool Things About the XM8 Assault Rifle Media-Approved Facts About the Democrat Spy Changes to Make Christianity More "Inclusive" Secret John Kerry Senatorial Accomplishments John Edwards Campaign Excuses John Kerry Pick-Up Lines Changes Liberal Senator George Michell Will Make at Disney Torments in Dog-Hell Greatest Hitjobs
The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny More Margaret Cho Abuse Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed" Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means Wonkette's Stand-Up Act Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report! Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet The House of Love: Paul Krugman A Michael Moore Mystery (TM) The Dowd-O-Matic! Liberal Consistency and Other Myths Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate "Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long) The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) |