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June 08, 2016

Top Ten Reasons That Seeing the Female Ghostbusters Movie Is an Act of Unequaled Moral and Political Courage

10. Because if you don't see Ghostbusters, then you support the current regime of a world dominated by ghosts (the spectrarchy)

9. Because female ghosts have to work twice has hard to be considered half as scary as male ghosts

8. Because the Female Ghostbusters movie passes the Bechtel test: two ghosts have a conversation in which "the living" are never brought up once

7. Because Shut Up Hater

6. Because inside every little girl is an Angry Ghost who must be endlessly appeased unless you want her to haunt you forever when she dies

5. Because it's important to show young girls that they can be more than homemakers-- they can be Mass Media Consumers & targets of soulless corporate advertising campaigns, too!

4. Because Studies show conclusively that when a man dies and comes back as a ghost to get his vengeance, he is considered "justly angered," but when a woman comes back as a ghost to get the same vengeance, she's considered "bossy"

3. Because we want all young girls to know they can be anything they can imagine themselves to be -- as long as they're dead, and they die with unfinished business, and are not given a proper Christian burial

2. Because you saw those awful Lost in Space and Wild Wild West reboots too -- you know you did, stop playin' -- so if you don't see this new abortion, you're a racist or whatever

..and the number one reason seeing Ghostbuster is an act of uncommon moral courage...

1. Because in 1965, the immortal words "I ain't afraid of no ghosts" were first uttered by Rosa Parks as she bravely sat in the seat traditionally reserved for the souls of people who'd died in bus crashes

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posted by Ace at 02:02 PM

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