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May 11, 2015
NFL Suspends Tom "Cheatyhands" Brady For Four Games
Update: Some more penalties:
The league also fined the Patriots $1 million and took away two draft picks, including next years' first-round choice.
The NFL also indefinitely suspended the two equipment staffers who carried out the plan, including one who called himself "The Deflator."
It gets worse. He's also been ordered to stare soulfully into Hillary Clinton's eyes.
The Haggard Queen has answered 8 media questions since announcing her presidential bid, and has not answered any media questions in 20 days.