Overnight Open Thread (6-25-2014)

How to Tell Which Sex You Are

Well you could cheat in your typical hetero-gendernormative fashion and just rummage around your crotch area while keeping a running count of bumps and appendages.

Or you could take this more hygienic albeit less thrilling word test:

If you recognize more words from column A than column B, well you just might be a P-wielding 'male'. And if you know more words from B than A, well you might be a moronette-type 'female'.

And if you know all the words, well you're freakin' genius and should probably spend you time more productively than skulking around here. Me - I'm apparently a confused metrosexual near-genius 'male' since I missed 'mascarpone' whatever the hell that is.

The Children Have Heard the Pied Piper's Call and Are Making Their Way Here

In related news Senator Harry Reid Has Opened a Shelter For Unaccompanied Migratory Boys and the Soylent Corporation is helping ICE build a huge processing facility for migrant kids.

We really shouldn't think of them as an unwanted wave of illegal immigrant children but rather as a steady cornucopia of fresh kidneys, livers, corneas, hearts, lungs, gums, skin, hair, nougat, animal feed, and the ever-popular pluripotent stem cells. And like the native americans we should strive to use all of the parts in order to preserve this sustainable resource.

GWB Rehabilitation Watch

And Jimmy C can breath a sigh of relief for once.

Our Modern Justice System

Cop Executes Downed, Handcuffed Prisoner on Camera, Prosecutors Refuse to Charge Him

AF Sgt Shoots Man Who Broke into his House at 2am, Prosecutors Charge Him With Murder

FAA Bans Delivering Packages With Drones

Whether it's charged for or included as part of free shipping. Amazon hardest hit.

Sun God Unsettled

The sun unleashed a series of three huge flares last week. Scientists are dubbing the sun's exploits lately a "mini-max" because the maximum period of activity is shorter than usual. Today the sun is a pretty active place.

...This situation demonstrates how hard it is to forecast a solar cycle. The average is 11 years, but it can take between 9 and 14 years for the sun to go from quiet to maximum and quiet again. Sometimes the cycle breaks, such as the infamous "Maunder minimum" that happened for 70 years in the 17th century, when few sunspots were visible. While this cycle is not quite that bad, it's still a weakling.

And of course the classic moron comment (whose author is now lost to the ages):

If only there were some... natural explanation for falling and rising temperatures.

Such a hypothetical source of warming would have to be massive, however. On the order of magnitude of our own Sun.

On This Weekend in 1984

You could watch the following movies in theaters:

Ghostbusters
Gremlins
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
The Karate Kid
Star Trek III: The Search for Spock
Top Secret!
The Natural
Police Academy

You heard the following hit songs on the radio:

The Reflex - Duran Duran
Time After Time - Cyndi Lauper
Let's Hear It for the Boy - Deniece Williams
Dancing in the Dark - Bruce Springsteen
Self Control - Laura Branigan
The Heart of Rock & Roll - Huey Lewis
Jump - The Pointer Sisters
When Doves Cry - Prince
Eyes Without a Face - Billy Idol
Borderline - Madonna

And these were the top TV shows:

The Dukes of Hazzard
Fantasy Island
Webster
Dallas
Diff'rent Strokes
60 Minutes
The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson
Late Night with David Letterman

Note that 0 people were killed in Ghostbusters and apart from Temple of Doom the rest of the movies have a single digit at most combined body count. Or not - I'm just going off memory here.

Rosebudding: The Trend

It's apparently a thang. And it's in the urban dictionary which means it's totally legit and verified and everything. But trust me you will lead a better, happier life not investigating any further than this. Seriously just go here instead and don't look back.

The Group knows what you did.

Tonight's post brought to you by mix tapes:

Notice: Posted by force majeure of Maetenloch Corp LTD GmbH. Please e-mail overnight open thread tips to maetenloch at gmail. Otherwise send tips to Ace. You know why.

posted by Maetenloch at 09:24 PM

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