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August 28, 2013

HuffPo "Contributor" Directs Sex Fantasy Attack at Dana Loesch

Of course.

The attack involves degredation via anal sex and Allah's vengeance for the unrighteous. Kind of like the Reeces' Peanut Butter Cups of hate.

Progressive blogger Pascal Robert, known online as “THOUGHT MERCHANT,” launched a vile attack against conservative radio host Dana Loesch on Tuesday.

Here is what I have learned:

Anyone who claims to be "funny!" or "witty!" in their Twitter profiles is neither.

Anyone who proclaims he will deliver THE TRUTH has none to share.

And anyone proclaiming his profundity of THOUGHT is borderline retarded, and I apologize for the derogatory use of the word "borderline."

We don't really have to advertise the things we are, only the things we wish we were.

Top Ten Translations For Self-Brags In People's Twitter Profiles

10. "professional writer" = "I have a blog. Also, I aspire to craft Percy Jackson jailbait fanfic"

9. "Funny! Witty! Snarky!" = "I say the f-word a lot because that's comedy. I also use exclamation points because they're super-funny too!"

8. "PREPARE FOR THE TRUTH!!!!!!!!!" = "I am on a cocktail of haldol and Zoloft and murder fantasies"

7. "I've got NO TIME for STUPIDITY!!!!" = "I have a great deal of time for stupidity"

6. "pro-sex feminist" = "I talk online about how much I love sex as political propaganda but actually I have issues and I don't even mean the fun sexy issues that strippers have"

5. "freeminded atheist on a personal mission to probe the truth in all its forms" = "I was once retweeted by Penn Gilette"

4. "progressive male" = "i might rape you. also, ur a fag"

3. "#NoH8" = "I hate nearly everybody, but particularly those I come into contact with which, thanks to my anti-social personality disorder and crippling social anxiety, is mostly limited to twitter and having disputes with delivery boys"

2. "nyc" = "the most interesting thing is my zip code, which I mention with no capitals like I'm casually dropping the name 'Steven Spielberg,' and, by the way, it's really not even my zip code, because even though I say 'nyc,' if I'm being honest, it's Montclair, NJ"

...and the Number One Translation of a Twitter Self-Brag...

1. "I'm Meghan McCain" = "Deny it all you want but you'd hit this sh*t. I mean, look at these. They're like cantaloupes made of Joy and Dreams"

Update: Scott M. decides to play the "racism" card. Let's see how that turned out for him.

Where's the rape part of that quote? He asked her if she would like to have a brother give it to her up the ass. The only way that's rape is if it's assumed that Dana would only take it up the ass (using the quote) from a brother would be over protest, ie, non-consensual sex. That says more about the assumption than the quote, doesn't it?

Posted by: Scott M.

hm. well-played.

Except I didn't say "rape," idiot. I said "sex fantasy."

YOU said rape.

so what's that say about YOUR assumptions, chief?

Posted by: ace

digg this
posted by Ace at 03:26 PM

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