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« GOP Eyes Cutting Media Out of the Primary Debate Loop | Main | Dude Drives Truck Into Ravine, Immortality »
August 20, 2013

After a Thorough and Searching Review, John Kerry's State Department Clears Itself of All Possible Negligence in Benghazi Attack

Wow, our government is really firing on all cylinders!

Every time there's a scandal or a tragedy they report back to us in six or nine months that they've absolved themselves of any errors or malfeasances!

Wow! I've never been so convinced of the government's fundamental competency before!

All stations are green and we are Go for Launch!!!

The State Department is insisting that secretary of state John Kerry’s decision to reinstate four employees put on administrative leave in the wake of of last year’s Benghazi attack was the right call. A spokeswoman said that Kerry, after revewing the Accountability Review Board’s report on the attack and the “totality of the careers” of the four employees, determined that the the action taken against them was “not warranted.”

“These are people with real lives, real careers,” deputy press secretary Marie Harf told reporters on Tuesday​.

Oh my goodness they have careers. Some Americans have jobs, but Government Workers and members of the New Class have Careers. And Careers are very special things. They should not be lightly tossed aside over the matter of a couple or four deaths.

Asked who should be held accountable for the attack that resulted in the deaths of four Americans, including U.S. ambassador Christopher Stevens, Harf responded that the terrorists themselves are at fault.


“The people who were ultimately responsible were the terrorists who perpetrated the attack on us,” she said, though she conceded that “things could have been done better.”

The law calls gross errors that lead to deaths "criminal negligence," but, in the case of People With Careers, it's called "things that could have been done better."

The State Department, Harf insisted, is interested in “moving forward"...

Yes yes, I imagine so.

Whenever someone says they want to "Move Forward" your first question should be "Who are the victims and how many are there?"

The personnel will not be reassigned to security details. Apparently they did such a good job with security -- albeit, a good job which could have been done better -- that they'll be getting exciting new Careers in Things Having Nothing to Do With Their Previous Specialization.

Not because they failed, mind you. Just so that they can be Well-Rounded, as People With Careers always strive to be.

More: Jake Tapper, who also Has a Career, notices that the absolutely none of the People With Careers at State seem to have any responsibility for any errors they might make during the performance of duties relating to Their Careers.

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posted by Ace at 05:35 PM

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