Saturday Night ONT - tmi3rd, you ignorant slut. [krakatoa]

If it's Saturday, it must mean another substitute ONTblogger.

First, let me explain the title of the post. I don't mean to imply that tmi3rd is really retarded. Just that his post was really retarded, sir.

And that he's super easy.

Let's face it, there were countless factual errros in his piece. For instance: None of us care about John Wayne Bobbit, except as a cautionary tale about falling asleep anywhere near his wife, or maybe, even your own. And he prostitutes his posts out to the highest bidder quicker and with more regularity than Sen. Rubio swaps hats on the amnesty train.

And you, like I, are probably wondering how a link to a blogsite run by a demented man can possibly find its onto the hallowed pages of AoSHQ.

Well, let's be clear about just who DDR is, and more importantly, what he does for fun and profit. On the surface, Walt appears to be a mild-mannered, self-described "freelance writer and photographer ". This is a ruse intended to lull you into a false sense of squishy security.

Indeed, the man is in deep with the horrifying underground baby-seal combat tournament scene.

As evidenced by his contribution to last night's ONT, a video of a man squeezing a baby seal (who likely lost too many times in "the icehole" to be of any value) as it shrieked in agony until it literally and repeatedly bursts into flames.

Need more evidence of just how dangerous this man's hobbies are?

Anyone remember when SNL was funny? To be honest, I haven't watched it in, what, over a decade now?

But this was the stuff that kept me up late, and, coincidentally, ties in with today's ONT.

It's amazing how funny someone can be if they aren't worried that the PC brownshirts will bust down their doors for offending the anointed victim group du jour.

Which is a great object lesson, since all I know about SNL recently is that it spins off very occasionally amusing and often openly bigoted hacks who are also full-time presidential (D) ass-kissers and credit-card whores.

For instance, this tit is Jimmy Fallon:

Who am I to opine on teh funneh though? I'm just the substitute. Making you laugh isn't a requirement. All we subs need is the ability to fling poo for the pure joy of seeing where it sticks. And if some happened to stick to tmi3rd, well, them's the collateral damages.

This ONT brought to you by Substitute Teachers Annonymous. Don't be that guy:

-That Guy

Oh yea... gotta do that "caturday" thing, yeah? I used to love cats. Then I bought a house that had landscaping that needed tending. I don't mean to start a longbow/crossbow-style debate, but let's face it: Kittehs are teh Kute, but cats are often just plumb evil.

posted by Open Blogger at 09:36 PM

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