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October 03, 2012

Lawyer: My Client Has Been Unjustly Accused of "Butt-Chugging," and Further Is No Homo

You really need to watch the video.

So, first up. What is "butt-chugging"?

A person ingests alcohol from an orifice that is not the mouth, and thus alcohol is absorbed more quickly into the bloodstream. Basically, it’s like mainlining alcohol via the rectum.

Or, as this lawyer calls it, an "alcohol enema."

So, why is there a press conference? Because some fraternity brother was rushed to the hospital with a very high blood alcohol content, and the media claimed it was due to "butt-chugging."

Well-- this lawyer wants you to know his client finds butt-chugging "repulsive."

Now, the video is funny, but let's also remember that the media does not know what it's talking about and frequently lies for the purposes of a sensationalist headline. (The Florida face cannibal was not on "bath salts," for example. And George Zimmerman did not use a racial slur. And Duke Lacrosse. And on, and on, and on.)

I'm pretty willing to believe the media made this all up.

Still, this press conference comes off funny.

Thanks to @rdbrewer4.

posted by Ace at 07:29 PM

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Now, the video is funny, but let's also remember that the media does not know what it's talking about and frequently lies for the purposes of a sensationalist headline. (The Florida face cannibal was not on "bath salts," for example. And George Zimmerman did not use a racial slur. And Duke Lacrosse. And on, and on, and on.) I'm pretty willing to believe the media made this all up. Still, this press conference comes off funny. Thanks to @rdbrewer4. posted by Ace at 07:29 PM \| Access Comments <script language="javascript" src="http://adserver.adtechus.com/addyn/3.0/5235/1131537/0/170/ADTECH;loc=700;cookie=info;target=_blank;key=key1+key2+key3+key4;grp=[group]"></script><noscript><a href="http://adserver.adtechus.com/adlink/3.0/5235/1131537/0/170/ADTECH;loc=300;key=key1+key2+key3+key4;grp=[group]" target="_blank"><img src="http://adserver.adtechus.com/adserv/3.0/5235/1131537/0/170/ADTECH;loc=300;key=key1+key2+key3+key4;grp=[group]" border="0" width="300" height="250"></a></noscript>	Recent Comments Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere [/i] [/b]: "[i]Good morning morons Awake before Pixy is awa ..." lurk: ">>Or they can all fuck off. Seconded. Call f ..." Ciampino --- it is just a pile of schist: "266 Cops in Europe are soft. Even the crooked ones ..." San Franpsycho: "Good morning morons Awake before Pixy is awake ..." Skip : "Time to get rolling ..." 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