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August 07, 2012

Breaking: Shaggy, Shambling Man-Child Believes Political Expression is "Creepy"

I wish I could call Zak Galifanakis a no-talent, but he's not. He's a funny guy.

But wise he is not. He's a goof, the sort of bumbling bohemian who is able to feed himself only because he's got one high-paying skill, and remains childlike in his ignorance about how other people make their rent. Or how the Magic Wires put Magic Beams in his lightbulbs.

There is always a culture clash between those who understand how productive industry actually works and those who gape at it like savages, believing it to be some kind of Heap Big White Man Magic. And where there is Magic, there are Sorcerors and Demons; for most people, particularly those of the primitive mindset, the large cloud of Unknowns is filled in by their imaginations with malice, conspiracy, and deviltry.

Zak Galifanakis will remain deeply suspicious of how the White Sorcerors called the Koch Brothers make their money; he will never question why he himself is being paid around $10 million per movie (and a shoot is about two months long, so that's $10 million for 60 days' work -- if that).

He understands his own good fortune -- "I'm funny, so of course I get paid more in two months than 95% of Americans and 99.9% of the world will be paid in a long lifetime" -- but not that of others. Others' fortune -- the non-bohemian types, those of the alien tribe -- must be the work of sorcery.

But now with Galifianakis bad-mouthing the conservative duo off screen, the Koch brothers are reminding people that he's just an actor.

In the comedy, actors Dan Aykroyd and John Lithgow play the Motch brothers, who are financially backing the implausible candidate portrayed by Galifianakis. In an interview with the New York Daily News on Monday, Galifianakis said it's "pretty obvious" the characters are based on Charles and David Koch.

"I disagree with everything they do. They are creepy and there is no way around that. It's not freedom what they are doing," Galifianakis said when asked about the Koch brothers.

What the Koch brothers are doing isn't "freedom." Freedom will exist when laws are passed to restrain the Koch brothers from doing what they choose to do.

Then, see, that will be freedom. Freedom, properly understood, is the fruit of government coercion, you must understand. If a man chooses to act or believe in a way that is contrary to the teachings of Barack Obama (or his lesser, stonier disciple Zak Galifanakis), then that man is not truly free.

He will be free when he is forced to act or believe in the proper fashion. Only then, only by action of the state, only by liberation through bondage, will be freed from his sins and ensorcellments.

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posted by Ace at 05:08 PM

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