« Natural 20: Town Hall Protester Scores a Critical Hit on Norm Dicks | Main | Revealed: The Actual Audio of the Moon Landing »
September 05, 2009

Reminder: Don't Piss Off the Judge

Every now and then I post one of these where an attorney has done something stupid and gets smacked down for it. I can't help it; they make me happy.

In this weekend edition, let's point and laugh at some greedy attorneys leeches trying to get in on a class action settlement (PDF).

[I]n a pleading which may charitably be described as disingenuous, Objectors’ Counsel argue they assisted the Court in finding class counsel’s fee request unreasonable. They claim their efforts convinced the Court to reduce class counsel’s fee from $110 million to $64.8 million. They have the temerity to suggest they are the ones who saved the class $45 million in attorney fees, entitling them to a six-figure fee of their own.[FN1]

[FN1] Objectors’ Counsel maintain their “lodestar” is “approximately $74,500,” and request a multiplier of 2.5. [Docket No. 846, at ¶ 8.] The Court considers it preposterous that any legitimate lawyer would charge $74,500 to prepare an eight-page submission, and submit it tardy to boot.

Their suggestion is laughable. If the Court may be permitted an egregious paraphrase of Winston S. Churchill: Seldom in the field of securities litigation was so little owed by so many to so few. Objectors’ Counsel make “outlandish fee requests in return for doing virtually nothing.” In re Cardinal Health, 550 F. Supp. 2d at 753. And nothing is the quantity of assistance they have provided to the Court and the class. Their goal was, and is, to hijack as many dollars for themselves as they can wrest from a negotiated settlement. Objectors’ eight-page-long, two-week-late pleading presented no facts, offered no law, and raised no argument upon which the Court relied in its deliberation or ruling concerning class counsel’s motion for fees. Indeed, the Court expressly rejected the lion’s share of objectors’ arguments directed to the use of paralegals and contract attorneys.

Accordingly, the Court holds, as a matter of fact and law, objectors have conferred no benefit whatsoever on the class or on the Court. Objectors’ Counsel are entitled to an award equal to their contribution . . . nothing.

Ouch.

BTW, that final ellipsis is not my doing. That's how the judge wrote it.


digg this
posted by Gabriel Malor at 09:45 PM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
Duke Lowell : "Hmmmmmmm. Weird. ..."

Slapweasel, (Cold1), ([b]T[/b]) Baseball Nut [/i] [/b] [/u] [/s]: "*Boom-Shakka-Lakka!* ..."

Alberta Oil Peon, survivor of GNAMM: "Coolest physics demo I saw was a standing wave, di ..."

buzzion: "[i]386 Oh dear, am I gonna go all militant German ..."

tu3031: "Went to school near there in the 80's - very Irish ..."

2009Refugee: "Oh dear, am I gonna go all militant German Left Wi ..."

buzzion: "[i]381 Baader-Meinhof. Posted by: flounder, rebel ..."

flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner: "Coolest physics demo I saw was a standing wave, di ..."

riktheYFITB: "Know how there's one (1) Howard Johnson's restaura ..."

Bob @ NSA: "[i]I had never heard of that bowling ball demo, th ..."

flounder, rebel, vulgarian, deplorable, winner: "Baader-Meinhof. ..."

Professor Chaos aka gumdrop gorilla: "This Damon Affleck thing is also not good for Jimm ..."

Recent Entries
Search


MuNuvians
Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
News/Chat
Archives
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64