« MSNBC Notices Earmark Hypocrisy... of Republicans | Main | Nancy Pelosi Caught In Lie About Demanding a Larger Plane »
March 11, 2009

Berliners Mount New Charm Offensive

BERLIN (Reuters) – Berlin has launched a new "friendliness" campaign to keep tourists flocking to the German capital during a time of economic crisis.

With the 20th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall looming in November and the World Championships in athletics due in August, police, street cleaners, airport staff and taxi drivers have begun wearing special red pins to signal to visitors that they are ready to lend a helping hand.
----------------------------

"Berlin has a reputation in Germany of being a rude city, but we're a rude city with a heart. A heart, a third nipple, and hideously pierced genitals, to be more honest." said Rene Gorka, head of Berlin Partners, a marketing group that promotes the city. "Don't forget the vilest scheiss porn collection in the world," interjected Cornelius, Rene's live-in Whipping Midget, from his perch on a small leather crucifix at the far end of the office. At this, Rene dashed across the room and sodomized Cornelius viciously with a parsnip, praising him.

OK, no, not really.


digg this
posted by LauraW. at 03:23 PM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
sunny-dee: "joncelli, you're on my list now. ..."

Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Booking Agent, Aero Pinochet: "Yay! GP! ..."

sunny-dee: "First? Really? ..."

joncelli, because somebody had to: "Holy crap it's Leonard Nimoy in a merkin! ..."

Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Booking Agent, Aero Pinochet: "Nood silverback ..."

Bear with Assymetrical Balls: "472 - I'm in the same boat. I would not have seen ..."

Anna Puma (HQCaR): "So you are fluent in more than 3,000? ..."

Vic We Have No Party: "I just checked my recipe program for Stouffer's cr ..."

Dang: " Each adjective on a menu is going to cost yo ..."

garrett: ">>After 40+ years as a small business I'm used to ..."

Anon a mouse: "It's a plate of slightly-cooked vegetables with a ..."

TheQuietMan: " So anyone going to see Star Wars? Posted by ..."

Recent Entries
Search


MuNuvians
Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
News/Chat
Archives
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64