Intermarkets' Privacy Policy Support
Donate to Ace of Spades HQ! Contact
Ace:aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com Buck: buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com CBD: cbd at cutjibnewsletter.com joe mannix: mannix2024 at proton.me MisHum: petmorons at gee mail.com J.J. Sefton: sefton at cutjibnewsletter.com Recent Entries
Daily Tech News 21 December 2024
Just The ONT, Ma'am Giant Animals Cafe Quick Hits Democrat Strategist Ruy Texiera: The Public Gave the Democrats a Clear Message About Their Rejection of Identity Marxism, But the Democrats Don't Want to Listen Kamala Harris To Be Offered $20 Million in a Media Payoff Disguised as an "Advance" on Book Royalties Plus: Media Makes Excuses for Covering Up Biden's Obvious Senility AGAIN: A Car Plows Through a German Christmas Market at a Very High Speed, Sending People Flying Like Bowling Pins, Killing an Unknown Number David Samuels: Barack Obama Created and Maintains an Echo Chamber Messaging System That Deranges and Perverts People's Thinking Every Day LOL: MSNBC Reportedly Demands That Joy Reid, Stephanie Ruhle Take Pay Cuts to Keep Their Jobs Slimmed-Down Version of CR Fails, With 38 Republicans Voting Against It Absent Friends
Bandersnatch 2024
GnuBreed 2024 Captain Hate 2023 moon_over_vermont 2023 westminsterdogshow 2023 Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022 Dave In Texas 2022 Jesse in D.C. 2022 OregonMuse 2022 redc1c4 2021 Tami 2021 Chavez the Hugo 2020 Ibguy 2020 Rickl 2019 Joffen 2014 AoSHQ Writers Group
A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published.
Contact OrangeEnt for info:
maildrop62 at proton dot me Cutting The Cord And Email Security
Moron Meet-Ups
|
« Democratic Councilman Pees on Crowd from Balcony at Concert |
Main
| Vid: Gay Marriage Protesters Getting Ugly »
November 11, 2008
Brief (I Hope) DVD ReviewThe Strangers. If we rate by how well the writer/director, crew, and actors achieved their intended purpose, it gets... well, I'll say three and a half stars. Here's a short review: I am never scared by horror movies. And by "never," sure, I mean I sometimes jump at the pop-ups, but basically I view them as violent comedies. Not real comedies, but leaning towards the comic side of the drama/comedy axis. They're funhouse movies, by and large-- cheap thrills, cheap scares. Now, here's what I did on this one: I turned it off. After an hour of nerve-wracking tension and plenty of scares, one scare about three quarters of the way through sent me jumping off the bed. At that point, I said, 'Well, that's it for me!" and turned it off. I turn off bad movies all the time. But this isn't a bad movie. It's very good. And I didn't turn it off due to gore -- there's almost no gore in this. (Almost -- and what there is is pretty damn light for a horror movie. It's less bloody than a typical action movie.) It's almost all just tension, anticipation, and then... the scares. I'd had it with the scares. My spine was tingling, I had the creeps and heebie-jeebies, and I wanted to go to bed without nightmares. As it was it still took me an hour to get rid of the creepy-crawly goosebumps. Here's the trailer. I thought this sonofabitch looked creepy as hell. For once, a horror trailer that actually isn't quite as good as the movie.
This movie is astonishingly minimalist. Two protagonists, three psycho-sadistic home invaders, one house, one barn. There are only four characters with speaking roles. Only two of them have more than three or four lines (that would be the victims of this relentless terrorizing by masked sadists, Liv Tyler and Scott Speedman), and even the main characters barely talk. There's little music. Most of the time the camera just follows around Liv Tyler as she looks around for trouble. The camera work on that is really good, by the way. A typical shot will show Liv Tyler in profile, looking left to right, her head at the far left of the screen, her dark hair terminating the left edge of the frame. And even when there's not a scare, I was sitting there thinking "Move the camera to the left! The left! I want to see what's behind her!" Of course the director does not oblige. He sets such a creepy mood, though, that even when he's not building towards anything in particular, you're still on edge. I can't imagine what the script looked like. If the movie itself is minimalist, the script must have been even more so -- barely any dialogue, long scenes in which not a lot seems to happen (just someone looking around, etc.). No one-liners. No jokes. No speeches. No detective work. No cutesy reversals. No surprise twists. No heroic moments at which the victims decide They Shall Be Victims No Longer. It turns out this was a really good script, but how on earth would someone have figured out it was a good blueprint for a movie with so little obvious big movie moments on the page? I'm perplexed by this-- having seen the actual movie, I know it was a good script. But how could anyone have read something so sparse and seemingly underwritten and realized it was good? I suppose they just had faith in the director (who wrote it) to deliver at what was barely hinted at on the page. As far as horror movie stupidity-- there are only minor stupidities. Here they are: Our cellphones don't work! This one is simply obligatory. Horror requires isolation, and isolation requires getting rid off the cellphones, often in contrived ways. There's really no alternative whatsoever-- so you can't even hold this one against the movie at all. It's simply a prerequisite if you're to have a horror movie in the first place. With cellphones, you don't have a horror movie. You have a call-the-cops-and-out-of-danger-in-20-minutes movie. The psychos are human, but seem gifted with Light-to-Moderate powers of invisibility, teleportation, and clarivoyance. I stress "light to moderate," though. Yes, there are a few cases where they seem a little too good at this creepy terrorizing thing. But only a little bit, and it really doesn't become anywhere near ridiculous. More of a nit than a criticism. Most of the movie we don't see them -- we just wonder where they are -- so we don't know what they're doing off-screen. But really, they are very good at creeping around and appearing menacingly in background. The main characters do something very stupid. Overall, they don't act dumb, but they do do one thing that's absurd. After finding a shotgun and holing up against a wall with the gun trained on the door, Scott Speedman gets the great idea that he will go outside to the barn to try to make a call on the old radio there. And, um, he insists that Liv Tyler remain in the house (where they already know the psychos can enter at will) alone and without a weapon. Instead of joining him, where he could protect her, and she could provide a crucial second set of eyes. Okay, that's stupid as hell. But hardly the worst case of stupidity in a horror movie. With those exceptions, not really anything here to mock as stupid. And even those are pretty mild. Anyway, scary stuff.
I guess basically the movie is those first ten scary minutes of Scream, played with a lot more understatement and without the big Hollywood moments, made into an 80 minute movie. That might sound like a lot of padding, but it's not as it turns out. NRA Propaganda: Heh. Yes, as some point out in the comments, this is pretty much an 80 minute long commercial for owning a shotgun... and taking an NRA self-defense course so you don't do stupid things with it. Delayed Gratification: (Vague, technique-related spoiler.) One clever thing the director does here is to avoid the obvious scares early. Four or five times Liv Tyler and/or Speedman are looking out a window into the distance, looking for their tormentors. Now, this is obvious the place for a pop-up -- one of the masked freaks jumps up from beneath the window, right in their faces, to scare them. But the director avoids that, mostly. But the effect is you're still waiting for that inevitable pop-up, so you're still on edge the whole time, knowing it's coming. But it doesn't. The scare is so obvious, so utterly obligatory he doesn't even have to actually provide it-- just by setting up the obvious, you anticipate it, and get 90% of the scare even when it doesn't come. Except... well, not to give a spoiler away, but at some point in the movie he does something along these lines, though he disguises it so you don't see it coming. (I didn't, at least.) And when he did finally pull the trigger on that one -- the one I had been dreading for most of the movie-- well, that's when I turned it off. I had been anticipating that pop-up for a long time, and he finally did it when I wasn't expecting it. TV off. That was the one. He does this sort of thing at other times, setting up an obvious jump-out or pop-up or grab-through, etc., without actually delivering. In a way maybe this is a scarier way to do it -- if he delivers on the expected, there's a feeling of relief of tension. Hey, you saw it coming, it came, so you kinda feel like you're on top of this. But by repeatedly failing to pull the trigger on the really obviously set-up Here Comes the Scare moments, it leaves you without that feeling of released tension. | Recent Comments
pawn (on his new laptop!!!):
"So would you rather have him hanging out and messi ..."
IRONGRAMPA: "Good morning, good people, from the Frigidrondacks ..." publius, Rascally Mr. Miley (w6EFb): " Darn, missed the solstice. It was at 09:21Z, 4: ..." Skip : "Have snow ground cover hete ..." Aetius451AD: ""Disclaimer: Posted slightly early because I'm goi ..." Grumpy and Recalcitrant[/i][/b]: "@18/Colin: *looks at calendar* Well whattya know ..." Mr Aspirin Factory, red heifer owner: "Good Morning. Much driving today ..." Just Wondering : "Birdbath status? ..." Colin: "Happy winter everyone..... If congressional leade ..." Buzz Adrenaline: "Horde mind. ..." Grumpy and Recalcitrant[/i][/b]: "And now I'm awake enough to see that Buzz made the ..." Village Idiot's Apprentice: "G'morning, all. I believe that Pixy has dieta ..." Recent Entries
Daily Tech News 21 December 2024
Just The ONT, Ma'am Giant Animals Cafe Quick Hits Democrat Strategist Ruy Texiera: The Public Gave the Democrats a Clear Message About Their Rejection of Identity Marxism, But the Democrats Don't Want to Listen Kamala Harris To Be Offered $20 Million in a Media Payoff Disguised as an "Advance" on Book Royalties Plus: Media Makes Excuses for Covering Up Biden's Obvious Senility AGAIN: A Car Plows Through a German Christmas Market at a Very High Speed, Sending People Flying Like Bowling Pins, Killing an Unknown Number David Samuels: Barack Obama Created and Maintains an Echo Chamber Messaging System That Deranges and Perverts People's Thinking Every Day LOL: MSNBC Reportedly Demands That Joy Reid, Stephanie Ruhle Take Pay Cuts to Keep Their Jobs Slimmed-Down Version of CR Fails, With 38 Republicans Voting Against It Search
Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Primary Document: The Audio
Paul Anka Haiku Contest Announcement Integrity SAT's: Entrance Exam for Paul Anka's Band AllahPundit's Paul Anka 45's Collection AnkaPundit: Paul Anka Takes Over the Site for a Weekend (Continues through to Monday's postings) George Bush Slices Don Rumsfeld Like an F*ckin' Hammer Top Top Tens
Democratic Forays into Erotica New Shows On Gore's DNC/MTV Network Nicknames for Potatoes, By People Who Really Hate Potatoes Star Wars Euphemisms for Self-Abuse Signs You're at an Iraqi "Wedding Party" Signs Your Clown Has Gone Bad Signs That You, Geroge Michael, Should Probably Just Give It Up Signs of Hip-Hop Influence on John Kerry NYT Headlines Spinning Bush's Jobs Boom Things People Are More Likely to Say Than "Did You Hear What Al Franken Said Yesterday?" Signs that Paul Krugman Has Lost His Frickin' Mind All-Time Best NBA Players, According to Senator Robert Byrd Other Bad Things About the Jews, According to the Koran Signs That David Letterman Just Doesn't Care Anymore Examples of Bob Kerrey's Insufferable Racial Jackassery Signs Andy Rooney Is Going Senile Other Judgments Dick Clarke Made About Condi Rice Based on Her Appearance Collective Names for Groups of People John Kerry's Other Vietnam Super-Pets Cool Things About the XM8 Assault Rifle Media-Approved Facts About the Democrat Spy Changes to Make Christianity More "Inclusive" Secret John Kerry Senatorial Accomplishments John Edwards Campaign Excuses John Kerry Pick-Up Lines Changes Liberal Senator George Michell Will Make at Disney Torments in Dog-Hell Greatest Hitjobs
The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny More Margaret Cho Abuse Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed" Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means Wonkette's Stand-Up Act Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report! Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet The House of Love: Paul Krugman A Michael Moore Mystery (TM) The Dowd-O-Matic! Liberal Consistency and Other Myths Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate "Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long) The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) |