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September 10, 2008

Higgs Boson == Flying Cars!

In this post I briefly explored one of the things the LHC might be able to accomplish - to prove or disprove the existence of the Higgs Boson. Foolishly, I originally thought the only practical use for the LHC would be as a doomsday weapon to stop the replicators.

I was wrong.

I just got back from making a Cheetos and energy drink run to WalMart and had a revelation delusion during the drive home. Pounding energy drinks and Cheetos does this to me on occasion.

Stipulating the Higgs Boson exists, and it really is what creates mass in other particles, then a whole universe of technological marvels await.

Consider -- all we need is a way to chase all the Higgs Bosons out of a region of space and we effectively render all other matter in that space massless. We just need to find something the HB's wouldn't like being around, like maybe Brussels sprouts, fried liver, Helen Thomas in a bondage outfit, etc.

Massless matter == anti-gravity device.
Anti-gravity device == flying cars.

Hop in, activate the anti-boson device, and you're zipping along without a care in the world. Even better -- now that you're now massless, you can run into shit and not get hurt. The only reason car/airplane crashes hurt is because of mass. Eliminate the mass and you eliminate the damage. Fun, fun, fun!

The ABD also opens up the real possibility of a FTL drive.

E=MC2 right? Conventionally, the power needed to even approach light speed grows massive and limits your ability to go any faster.

What happens in E=MC2 when M==0 as it would when an ABD is activated? You got it baby! E==0. E==0 means you can kick that pig with all the horsepower you want and the speed of light is no longer a factor since you're massless.

OK, I'll start the bidding for this revolutionary IP at a paltry 100 billion bucks. Who'll pony up a hundred billion to be the first on their block to have an FTL drive?

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posted by Purp at 04:07 AM

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