Sponsored Content

Google Search of the Day | Main | Hey, I've Got a Rumor, and I Demand Documentation to Disprove It
September 01, 2008

Ha ha ha ha ha ha...

Oh, mercy!

Supposedly this is "Todd Palin" ragging on his wife, and expressing his horror at being upstaged by her, upon being informed that his wife has been elected mayor.

Couple of problems: 1, it doesn't look like him, 2, he has a strange case of emphysema that one wouldn't expect from a young athletic man, 3, it sounds ludicrously scripted as he makes what should be subtext pure text and repeats his daughter's name -- "Bristol" -- sixty-three thousand times, to prove that it's "real."

How many times do you say the name of the person you're speaking to in a single conversation?

I also like the versimilitude of it, as he offers a very convincing, very detailed bit of business about commercial fishing: "Daddy's going fishing today... he's got some new nets."

Gotta be real. Who else but a commercial fisherman would be so fluent with details about the trade like "nets"?

Update: A commenter points out -- hey, check out the advanced, miniaturized cell phone technology they had only in Alaska back in 1996! The rest of us, meanwhile, had to use landlines, with only Power Brokers and Drug Kingpins having cell phones, which were the size of a boot.

Alaska's a backwater? Nonsense. It's at least a full tech level ahead of us. The secret? Special snow-based technology. The Eskimos have over forty words for "integrated circuit."

Remember: This is a source that Alan Fucking Colmes trusts.

I have to stress: This is being seriously offered by those on the left as real. Not a parody, not a bit of snark, but real.

Bristol? Bristol? Daddy wants you to turn that camera off as daddy spills out his deepest psychic scars about inadequacy and emasculation. Wait, Bristol, you're not turning it off? You're going to keep on recording Bristol? Okay, Bristol, then I'll keep going in this absurdist dramatic monologue.

Did I ever tell you about the time I murdered a drifter with a can-opener and jumper cables, Bristol? I have? Oh, that's right, Bristol. It was the bedtime story I told you for six years, Bristol.

Go get daddy his lucky lynchin' rope. His Negro Detector is lightin' up like a Christmas tree. Bristol. Bristol. Bristol.

Are. You. Fucking. Kidding. Me.

Allah tips and notes this is the same imbecile who previously served as Alan Colmes' scary-authoriative "source" for the proposition that Sarah Palin jeopardized her baby's life by boarding that plane.

PS: She was already on the City Council and I'm guessing she won the mayorship in a walk, so I kinda doubt this would come as some sort of surprise to Todd Palin.

Another "Todd Palin" Video Surfaces!

Here's "Todd Palin" cavorting with his mistress!!! Out in public with his illicit lover!

Why did this video ever get recorded and then leaked? Why does "Todd Palin" look so different?

Shut up, that's why.

Another Embarrassing Todd Palin Video! Here's Todd Palin lookin' all gay and shit as he fronts 80's technopop act Scritti Politti.

Warning: Video contains synthesized drum fills.

digg this
posted by Ace at 05:24 PM

| Access Comments

Recent Comments
496: "Just watched the video of the 2 women arguing abou ..."

REDACTED: "258 Looks like Abbott is taking it in the shins ri ..."

Squirrel Community : "Nobody ever asks us...but we need nut control. ..."

Nova local: "322 My problem is, I’m not a “gadget&# ..."

fd: "BAR was way too heavy to be an assault rifle thoug ..."

Moron Robbie - the CEO of Moderna acknowledged the presence of patented sequence in Covid-19 : "There were kids who died in the hospital and a cou ..."

Archer: "I loved firing the M-14. Extremely accurate and h ..."

Hands: "[i]Cruz is up.[/i] Is he going to call NRA me ..."

rickb223 TEXIT [/s][/b][/i][/u]: ""Reading this post has made me want to pull the fi ..."

Thomas Bender: "@299 >>On purpose. The schools had been locked ..."

TheJamesMadison, fighting the system with Kobayashi: "326 Because without an adult forcing them to pay a ..."

Nova local: "315 311 Because they were deprived of interaction ..."

Recent Entries

Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64