Intermarkets' Privacy Policy
Support


Donate to Ace of Spades HQ!



Recent Entries
Absent Friends
Bandersnatch 2024
GnuBreed 2024
Captain Hate 2023
moon_over_vermont 2023
westminsterdogshow 2023
Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022
Dave In Texas 2022
Jesse in D.C. 2022
OregonMuse 2022
redc1c4 2021
Tami 2021
Chavez the Hugo 2020
Ibguy 2020
Rickl 2019
Joffen 2014
AoSHQ Writers Group
A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published. Contact OrangeEnt for info:
maildrop62 at proton dot me
Cutting The Cord And Email Security
Moron Meet-Ups





















« Republicans need to propose a future and work towards it (chad) | Main | Democrat Nelson Wants to End the Electoral College »
June 07, 2008

I Count Dead People votes. [krakatoa]

Connecticut seems to have an undead problem.

Jane Drury voted last year in an election in Stonington, Conn. The only problem is, she died eight years ago.

Zombibama girl
I'm a Zombibama girl!"


She wasn't the only one. Apparently the phenomena is fairly widespread throughout the state.

Journalism professor Marcel Dufresne, at the University of Connecticut, led a class investigation into dead voters and said his group of 11 students discovered 8,558 deceased people who were still registered on Connecticut’s voter rolls. They discovered more than 300 of them appeared somehow to have cast ballots after they died.

“We have one person who appeared to have voted 17 times since he died,” Dufresne said.


Scientists are puzzled at the phenomena. Indeed, there appears to be a certain amount of denial that it exists at all.

Connecticut Secretary of State Susan Bysiewicz is adamant that “actually no dead people voted.”

“I want to be very clear about that,” she said, explaining that while votes were cast and counted in the names of the dead, “there was no voter fraud at all in the state of Connecticut.”

If voter fraud is not the answer, then that leads to the frightening conclusion that the ravenous zombie horde voter menace is real. And nobody seems to know exactly what it is they want.

Some say these zombies are actually pacifists.

brains not bombs
If I could have one wish, it would be for World Peace. No, Brains, then World Peace.

The common denominator does appear to be a strong craving for "fressshh tasteee steaming braaaaainssss".

More red meat ticket.
Fresh red meat ticket.

However, this protester seems to indicate that the undead are in a fight for equality.

Vote for Zombie Affirmative Action
Vote for Zombie Cleavage. Er, Affirmative Action!

Despite official denials, it is hard to dismiss that something strange is happening, and government actions seem to indicate that they have some sort of black-ops plan to stamp out the flesh-eating monster menace.

In Connecticut, 5,000 have been purged in the last two months. That presumably means Jane Drury won’t be voting again, even as her daughter remains stumped that a ballot was cast in her mother’s name in the first place.

Courage. Oh. And, aim for their heads.

digg this
posted by xgenghisx at 08:35 PM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
Skip: "Bring your reading glasses BOOK THREAD NOOD ..."

OrangeEnt: "Insert last week's comment here. ..."

Just Some Guy: "Hi, gang ..."

pawn: "Got some nice big handles though! ..."

Skip: "Tolle Lege ..."

Florida Peasant : "Austin was trying to steer developers Historica ..."

m: "217 Where did Toto go? Posted by: Dorothy at June ..."

pawn: ""Where did Toto go?" Check the planes down in A ..."

Dorothy [/i]: " [i]There is a possible risk of severe weather to ..."

Way, Way Downriver [/i][/b]: "[i]Austin was trying to steer developers [/i] H ..."

Wolfus Aurelius, Dreaming of Elsewhere [/i] [/b]: "Got to get a few more things ready before the Book ..."

Marlon Perkins : "And most of those canals are inhabited by gators. ..."

Recent Entries
Search


Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64