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May 07, 2008

Dear Barry: Obama Writes an Advice Column

Which, for reasons I can't understand, is only being syndicated on Iowahawk's site.

You'd think it would at least get picked up by a Chicago paper. Or Oprah's magazine.

Dear Barry:

I am a graduate student at a large Midwestern university. Last semester I was seduced by an older female professor and we have been having a secret affair ever since. I know this is probably a "no-no," but despite our age gap we share many common ideas and values, and she has been very helpful in lining up grants and scholarships for me. The trouble is I recently discovered that she is also a fugitive bomb maker from a radical neo-Maoist terrorist splinter cell affiliated with the Manson family. My conscience tells me I ought to break things off, but I'm worried how it might affect my GPA. Please help!

Torn in Evanston


Dear Torn:

You did say "secret," didn't you? So let's keep it that way, and make sure you maintain plausible deniability. If Professor Hot Lips starts talking dirty about revolutionary bombing, try to steer the pillow talk back to something more innocuous, like Derrida or the price of arugula.

Thanks to RobG.

Even funnier than that, though, is Chris Matthews whining once again that some Republicans voted for Hillary.

Again, there was no such weary outrage when Kos directed his drooling minions to do the same thing to Republicans in Michigan.


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posted by Ace at 04:47 PM

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