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January 15, 2008

Deep Thoughts (3:30 am Ron Paul edition)

Sometimes, if we give Bandit The Wonder Dog too many after-dinner treats, he wakes us up about this time of the morning needing to go out and "take care of business". Since my wife's pregnant, lately I've been directed to take him out myself. I believe the exact quote is "Hey, take care of your damn dog!" Sometimes, while I'm standing in the cold waiting for him to find the perfect spot to loosen his bowels on, I have lightning strikes of inspiration. This morning, instead of going right back to bed, I decided to log on and share the inspiration with my favorite morons.

This morning, my thoughts drifted towards our favorite Constitutional Defender, Herr Doktor Science. I don't know why. Maybe it was the cold freezing my brain cells, maybe the strained look on Bandit's face as he tried to expel the last little bit of doggie doo from his colon reminded me of Herr Doktor's facial expressions from the last debate...but either way, my thoughts focused on Herr Doktor and his fiscal policies this morning.

Here's the breakdown:

According to his loyal Ronulans, Ron Paul has never VOTED for an unbalanced budget; BUT he's more than willing to lard up the budget that will eventually pass with earmarks for his district. Once the budget passes against his objections, he gets to have it both ways. He can claim to be a budget hawk because he voted against deficit spending, but he also gets to bring home the bacon at the same time.

Now, picture this: Ron Paul is standing on line at a bank. He's minding his own business, maybe even waiting to deposit some spare gold bullion he found under his couch cushions in his passbook savings account, when a gang of deficit spenders comes rolling up on the bank and takes it down, "Point Break"-style. They slap people around, scream at the tellers, and get a big ol' wad of cash and make their way to the door, but on the way out one of the gang hands Herr Doktor Science a couple bundles of $100s and tells him to "buy something nice for your friends & family".

What is A Principled Man of Science and The Last True Defender of the Constitution to do in this situation? Does he give the money to the cops when they arrive at the crime scene, or does he pocket the dough? If he stays true to his prior actions in Congress, I think he'll keep the money, and that's what's troubling me. By taking dirty money, even if he's going to give the loot to a good cause, isn't he just as guilty as the guys who actually stole the money in the first place?

Don't get me wrong. I'm not accusing Ron Paul of being a bank robber here. I'm just saying that profiting from an act while you loudly decry the illegality of the act at the same time isn't really that different from just taking the money & keeping your mouth shut. Well, there is the whole "stink of a hypocrite" thing there, but I guess one man's hypocrite is another man's "Constitutional Scholar".

Besides, does this really matter? I mean, when you're a racist anti-Semite who wants to hamstring American foreign policy & allow Al Quaida to rebuild their strength unmolested while we hide behind both the Atlantic & Pacific oceans, what's a little financial double talk in the grand scheme of things?

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posted by Russ from Winterset at 06:16 AM

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