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July 02, 2007

Matt Damon To Play... Captain Kirk?!?!

Here's a good example of why Hollywood is so stupid. They had to retire the Original Series cast in favor of the Next Generation cast because the TOS guys were too damn expensive. So out with Kirk and Spock and in with the lame Picard and camel-toe psychic.

Then those cast-members became too expensive -- and their movies made no money -- so they began playing with the idea of a "Star Fleet Academy" movie, where they'd cast young, very cheap actors to play the TOS guys in their youths.

Sort of a clever idea. Economically, I mean. You get Kirk without Shatner's cost. (Alas, also without Shatner, but then, he is getting rather old to be zooming around the galaxy.)

Okay, so basic, realistic economics of a series that continues to lose money but cost a lot to make says you need to go cheaper with your acting talent.

So who are they getting?

Matt Damon for Kirk, Adrian Brody for Spock, and Gary Sinise for McCoy. At least they're having "serious" talks with those cats.

Clarification: I mentioned the "Star Fleet Academy" idea as the background for this project. Clearly that concept has evolved. None of these men are close to being of academy age; they're about the same age of the original actors in TOS. So obviously they've changed the concept to just be the first flight of the Enterprise with an (adult) Captain Kirk in command.

So, obviously, this is not the long-discussed Academy project. It's just TOS -- a couple of years before the opening of the actual show.


I'm not going to go super hardcore conservative here and pretend that Damon doesn't have some talent. I'll also note he looks, slightly, like Shatner. And politics wise, at least he's balanced by the conservative leaning Sinise.

But how the hell did we go from trying to slash the budget of these movies by bringing in raw, cheap young talent to casting three heavyweights, all of whom have Oscars or Oscar nominations?

And... um, you're casting guys who are not "young" versions of Kirk, Spock, and McCoy, but who are... in the general age range of the actors who first played them.

Eh. I have to admit I'm kind of interested in the idea -- I want my Kirk, Spock, and McCoy back -- I'm just a little bewildered why they're chasing guys for the roles that they will have to pay a fortune to, especially for sequels.

Then again: I never noticed it before, but Sinise has McCoy's eyes. Or rather, the orbits of his eyes, which is what you notice.

And admittedly, TOS never showed the moment Kirk first took command of the Enterprise, or met Spock.

Okay, I'm on board with this. This is why Hollywood is so brilliant.

Really... Sinise as McCoy is inspired. Has the eyes, has the weary demeanor, has the southern accent.

I'm against Damon as Kirk, not on political grounds (though that doesn't help), but because Damon looks like a boy-man. He's kinda got that "Iowa farmboy" thing going, but emphasis on the boy. Kirk looked like an adult; Damon doesn't. And clearly they're not going for a truly young Kirk; they're just going for a few years before the opening of TOS. So Kirk should look like a man. They need someone else.

Brody's a decent actor, but, okay: The nose. He carries off that nose well enough, but we already know from 40 years of watching that Spock does not have a big honker.

We don't need doppelgangers to play these guys, but Damon's too much the callow man-boy and Brody's got that great big beak. Keep Sinise, dump the other two.

digg this
posted by Ace at 03:53 PM

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