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May 14, 2007

Illinois Introduces Hot Guy-On-Guy Action To Middle School Curriculum

Finally.

CHICAGO — A girl and her grandparents have sued the Chicago Board of Education, alleging that a substitute teacher showed the R-rated film "Brokeback Mountain" in class.

The lawsuit claims that Jessica Turner, 12, suffered psychological distress after viewing the movie in her 8th grade class at Ashburn Community Elementary School last year.

...

The lawsuit also names Ashburn Principal Jewel Diaz and a substitute teacher, referred to as "Ms. Buford."

The substitute asked a student to shut the classroom door at the West Side school, saying: "What happens in Ms. Buford's class stays in Ms. Buford's class," according to the lawsuit.

Ms. Buford's Class Schedule:

7:30-8:15 Men Shaving Their Balls

8:20-9:05 Men Shaving Other Mens' Balls

9:15-10:00 Two Dudes In A Camaro Boning The Hell Out Of Each Other And Listening To Bad Company

10:05-11:50 Guys Fisting Each Other For Money And Then Spending The Money On More Fisting

lunch

12:10-12:45 Men Going Down On Men They Just Met At The Gym While Other Men Take Pictures

12:50-1:35 Homeroom


In other news, Ace is about to tell me that I'm not welcome around here anymore.


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posted by AndrewR at 05:08 PM

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