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September 28, 2006

Bulgarian Politician Suggests Purchasing A Gypsy Girl

I think the Brussels Journal is becoming my new favorite website.

Here's the setup, as I understand it: An obscure European magazine that deals with EU issues is having a Parliamentarian-of-the-Year contest. An attractive Hungarian gypsy woman has been nominated.

Enter an irate Bulgarian:

Well, gentlemen, I must disagree with you. In my country there’re tens of thousands gypsy girls way more beautiful than this honorable one.

Hey, fair enough. The man's just sticking up for the home team, right?

Well, maybe. Wait for it...

In fact if you’re in the right place on the right time you even can buy one (around 12-13 years old) to be your loving wife. The best of them are very expensive – up to 5,000 euros a piece, wow! Of course this is a crime according to the Penal code, Chapter Four (Crimes against the marriage, the family and the youth), Section II (Crimes against the youth), Article 191/3, punishable with 2 to 5 years of imprisonment, but I don’t think that most of the so-called “Roma rights organizations” even know about this article, and they in fact don’t care (call them what you want, they care only about anti-discrimination laws’ articles, because they pay, and crime doesn’t you now)!!! This is another story though.

Damn! I did not expect that!

I don't even know where to start with this. First, there's that "Wow!" he throws in there. "Know the delicious taste of absolute dominion over your own slave girl! Wow!" The man is clearly in awe of the bargain-basement prices offered by his nation's human-trafficking industry. Hell, so am I.

Then, there's the just-a-little-bit-too-knowledgable part about the laws against doing what he's just suggested. "I'm not suggesting that you should closely examine Article 34.704/13, subclause 8, in order to find the pubescent wife-buying loophole, because that would be wrong, but just know that it's there. I mean, like, just in case ."

The article seems to suggest there's some argument as to whether or not this is a joke. Personally, I don't think it is, an opinion I base on nothing more than my simple prejudice that Bulgarians are hairy, pillaging beasts.

Anyway, give a man a shovel and he'll just keep digging:

So let’s get back to Miss Laroka’s nomination. Believe me, I’ve seen lots of gypsy women, but all that are at her age are much skinnier. Doesn’t she sharing the terrible suffering her people are bearing all around Europe, the poverty, the miserable conditions and the unemployment???? Well, I guess when you’re an MEP you have to put some weight on you. Have to look serious.

Wow. If Mr. If-There's-Grass-On-The-Field is any indication, we American men still have a lot to learn from our suaver, more finely polished European counterparts.

A lot to learn.

Post Script:

By the way, "Roma" means gypsy. Kind of like the way Eskimos call themselves Inuits. I know this because I listen to this band.

digg this
posted by AndrewR at 10:00 PM

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