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"The Ladder Theory" of Relationships »
August 11, 2006
The Platonic, Redux
This is a repost of an entry originally written at Splitters.*
Ace has generously allowed me to cross-post it here. I am hoping that with a wider audience, I and other females who are in platonic relationships with men might get the answer we really want to hear.
But I donna theenk eet gonna happen.
The Platonic
I have a male friend.
We were in the same class in school, have known each other since we were 13 years old. Our friendship solidified when we were both nineteen, shortly after graduation. We ‘clicked.’ Used to go out all the time, with or without my boyfriend.
We got high a couple times (I have never been much for pot), but mostly hung out and had a few beers, watch a movie, talk and laugh until the wee hours. I spent a lot of time with his very large and musical family, who are loads of fun. Quite a few times he slept on my boyfriend’s couch after we’d chat half the night.
It seems to me that girls and boys can learn a lot about each other through simple platonic friendship. Things that make the rest of life a little easier. Its like learning another language.
Since those young years, we both have accumulated homes and family; he has a wonderful wife who I talk to occasionally on email, and three great kids, one of whom is my Goddaughter. She’s a teenager now. Time flies.
We now live many states apart, and our visits are separated by years.
He’s a good man and I am proud to be his friend.
My question is;
Is this possible?
Hubby says that platonic relationships between men and women are bullshit. I can honestly say I have never wanted to ‘do’ anything with the guy. Hubby says he wants me.
Is this just husbandly jealousy, or is it true that men and women just can’t really be friends?
I feel that I already know the answer, because I have lived it. But I’m interested in others’ experiences.
Just don’t bring up When Harry Met Sally. Please. Don’t.
*Cross-posted without the permission of Splitters Head Administrator, and I feel so good about that.
posted by Laura. at
06:29 PM
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