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March 20, 2006

Liberal Canadian Senator Defends Seal-Hunt By Invoking American Executions and "Torture"

Do these people have anything better to do than obsess about us?

I was never cool in high school. Or college. Or, like, ever. I think for one week in seventh grade I fit in okay, and then that all fell apart. And so here I am. Blogging.

But at least being an American gives me the feeling of being the cool kid in school, always feared, always secretly admired, and always, always talked about. Mostly bad stuff to cover up the secret admiration. And the great thing is there are all these dorks and gaywads -- like Canada, Germany, France, 90% of the Islamic world, etc. -- who do very little but obsess over our every action and comment. And yet we think very little of all about them, and are in fact barely even aware of their existance.

Except, you know, in the case of 90% of the Islamic world, which will not stop picking fights with us. We always kick their ass, but they're always back the next day, because they're insecure chumps with something to prove.

The world is a high school and America is the coolest, richest, most popular and most likely to succeed. And everyone, of course, just can't get over that.

A Liberal senator has replied to a family in Minnesota upset about Canada's seal hunt with a letter denouncing the United States for executing prisoners at home and killing people in Iraq. The McLellan family had written to Canadian senators to say they cancelled a vacation in Canada because of the hunt, which they called "horrible" and "inhumane," Montreal's La Presse reports.

In her response, Senator CĂ©line Hervieux-Payette said that what she finds horrible is "the daily massacre of innocent people in Iraq, the execution of prisoners - mainly blacks - in American prisons, the massive sale of handguns to Americans, the destabilization of the entire world by the American government's aggressive foreign policy, etc."

She said Americans are not in a position to criticize others. "They must start to look at their own behaviour, the permanent heightening of the planet's insecurity since the election of Bush," she told La Presse.

In a worrisome development, seals are beginning to plot terrorist actions against the United States, as that is the only way they can imagine they can get the dominant liberal Canadian political class on their side, perhaps even getting deemed "political refugees" as Al Qaedists are now.

Fortunately, as of yet these plans mostly consist of balancing balls on their noses; they're still "brainstorming" how these balls can be used as Weapons of Mass Destruction. Other plans involve scrod.

It's a tired theme of mine, but I just can't get over how so many people have turned politics into little more than a system of self-validation. You're a good person because you "feel" x; you're a good person because you say y. Most of liberalism is little more than a way to experience the satisfying emotional frisson of feeling superior to someone else.

And yet they'll yap all day about "Bible thumpers" who wear their pieties on their sleeves to show that they're holier than thou. For crying out loud, Fred Phelps could learn a thing or too from these people.

Thanks to Darwin's Moustache.

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posted by Ace at 02:38 PM

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