« 10 Billion Instant Messages Exchanged Per Day | Main | Media Whine Cheney Spoke With FoxNews »
February 16, 2006

Bryant Gumbel: Winter Olympics So White They Look Like a "GOP Convention"

Well, yeah, moron. Last time I checked, black kids weren't walking around in Nike Air Turino luge-cleats.

Suffice to say that Mr. Gumbel will not, in the near future, be commenting on the NBA looking like a Biggie Smalls funeral procession.

The quote:

Finally, tonight, the Winter Games. Count me among those who don’t like them and won’t watch them ... Because they’re so trying, maybe over the next three weeks we should all try too. Like, try not to be incredulous when someone attempts to link these games to those of the ancient Greeks who never heard of skating or skiing. So try not to laugh when someone says these are the world’s greatest athletes, despite a paucity of blacks that makes the Winter Games look like a GOP convention. Try not to point out that something’s not really a sport if a pseudo-athlete waits in what’s called a kiss-and-cry area, while some panel of subjective judges decides who won ... So if only to hasten the arrival of the day they’re done, when we can move on to March Madness — for God’s sake, let the games begin.

Is Gumbel suggesting he's only interested in sports if there are enough African-Americans fielded to whet his racial appetite?

Of course, this isn't an unheard of phenomenon. There's a reason most white guys like Brett Favre, and most black guys love Donovan McNabb (or used to, anyway). There's an element of identification in rooting in sports, and that identification is stronger when a player, well, looks like you. It's easier to indulge in the fantasy of "What if it were me getting the ball with 1.2 seconds left and needing three points to take the lead...?"

But it seems only black people can admit this. White people have to pretend that Larry Bird is not, in fact, Mr. Clutch, and that he only earned that sobriquet because racist white fans had to find some intangible reason to elevate him over Magic Johnson.

Video at the link.

PS: Is this one of Gumbel's occasional racially-provocative flare-ups designed to prove he's black?

You know this guy spends his off hours watching PBS' Mystery and Martha Stewart.

Thanks to Jack "Slublog" Straw.

UPDATE! Bryant Gumbel Has Been Shot By Dick Cheney!

The Vice President took "full responsibility" but added it was "just a horrible accident."

"I thought I was aiming at Greg Gumbel," he confessed.

Experienced hunters say one should always verify one is aiming at the proper Gumbel before pulling the trigger, although they add, "Look, if you get the wrong one, it's not exactly a national tragedy, you know what I mean?"

digg this
posted by Ace at 01:22 PM

| Access Comments

Recent Comments
Soothsayer -- Follow and Lick Me On Fakebook: " WE DON'T SERVE YOUR KIND HERE The Democrats a ..."

publius, Rascally Rapscallion of a Poperin Pear: ">> Does tucker still wear bow ties? He has sa ..."

platypus, gg channel: "Does tucker still wear bow ties? Posted by: NCKat ..."

Miley, the High Duchess [b] [/b] [i] [/i]: "I read that about George Will and threw up in my m ..."

tbodie [/s][/b][/i][/u]: "SHS should have told the restaurant owner to bake ..."

Dan Smoot's Apprentice: ""Why do democrats always want to ban people from r ..."

logprof: "I tell ya people, never trust a man in a bowtie! I ..."

Soothsayer -- Follow and Lick Me On Fakebook: " IOW.... WE DON'T SERVE [b]YOUR KIND[/b] H ..."

Skip : "Go to the Red Hen, have dinner, than before the wa ..."

Comrade Hrothgar [/i][/b][/u][/s]: "Posted by: votermom pimping NEW Moron-authored boo ..."

JuJuBee, just generally being shamey: "George Will is now telling people to vote Democrat ..."

LeftCoast Dawg: "237 So Sanders is the aggressor for reporting wha ..."

Recent Entries

Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64