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OneEyedJack: "The MOST expensive thing to buy is a trophy wife. ..."

Smell the Glove: "Good to see Hegseth punch back. Tit caused the res ..."

bonhomme[/i][/i][/i][/b][/b][/b][/s][/s][/s][/u][/u][/u]: "Justice Sotomayor uses the term, "you people" to r ..."

Sponge - F*ck Cancer: "[i]Besides the White House getting a deep cleaning ..."

ShainS -- Make Retribution Great Again! [/b][/i][/s][/u] : " @politvidchannel BREAKING: GOP senator Rand Paul ..."

Axeman: " 7 year olds wish they were Cookie Monster. What i ..."

Mike Hammer, etc., etc.: "Yeah, couldn't watch the WH vids. All that was mis ..."

...: "Rand Paul will never forgive Trump for calling him ..."

Cheri: "Besides the White House getting a deep cleaning be ..."

tubal: "Rand Paul is the poster boy of why to not be Liber ..."

Boron Cobbie - leftists, remember Trump would be out soon if you hadn't stolen 2020: "Rand was the guy who had his ribs broken by someon ..."

Recent Entries

Dank Brandon's Bewildered African Adventure
White House Once Again Turned Into Eyebleeding Gay Meth-Hallucination Nightmare by White Trash Delaware Hillbilly Biden Clan
Judge Orders Fani Willis to Disclose All Correspondence with the January 6th Committee
Wednesday Morning Rant
Mid-Morning Art Thread
The Morning Report — 12/4/24
Daily Tech News 4 December 2024
Overnight Open Thread - 12/03/2024
[Roger Ball]
Mission Impossible Cafe
Quick Hits

Polls! Polls! Polls!

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the Deal with the Cowbell?
Why is the Ace of Spades called "the Death Card"?

The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick

Primary Document: The Audio
Paul Anka Haiku Contest Announcement
Integrity SAT's: Entrance Exam for Paul Anka's Band
AllahPundit's Paul Anka 45's Collection
AnkaPundit: Paul Anka Takes Over the Site for a Weekend (Continues through to Monday's postings)
George Bush Slices Don Rumsfeld Like an F*ckin' Hammer

Top Top Tens

Democratic Forays into Erotica
New Shows On Gore's DNC/MTV Network
Nicknames for Potatoes, By People Who Really Hate Potatoes
Star Wars Euphemisms for Self-Abuse
Signs You're at an Iraqi "Wedding Party"
Signs Your Clown Has Gone Bad
Signs That You, Geroge Michael, Should Probably Just Give It Up

Signs of Hip-Hop Influence on John Kerry
NYT Headlines Spinning Bush's Jobs Boom
Things People Are More Likely to Say Than "Did You Hear What Al Franken Said Yesterday?"
Signs that Paul Krugman Has Lost His Frickin' Mind
All-Time Best NBA Players, According to Senator Robert Byrd
Other Bad Things About the Jews, According to the Koran
Signs That David Letterman Just Doesn't Care Anymore
Examples of Bob Kerrey's Insufferable Racial Jackassery
Signs Andy Rooney Is Going Senile
Other Judgments Dick Clarke Made About Condi Rice Based on Her Appearance
Collective Names for Groups of People
John Kerry's Other Vietnam Super-Pets
Cool Things About the XM8 Assault Rifle
Media-Approved Facts About the Democrat Spy
Changes to Make Christianity More "Inclusive"
Secret John Kerry Senatorial Accomplishments
John Edwards Campaign Excuses
John Kerry Pick-Up Lines
Changes Liberal Senator George Michell Will Make at Disney
Torments in Dog-Hell

Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)

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Advertise Here! Intermarkets' Privacy Policy Support Donate to Ace of Spades HQ! Recent Entries Dank Brandon's Bewildered African Adventure White House Once Again Turned Into Eyebleeding Gay Meth-Hallucination Nightmare by White Trash Delaware Hillbilly Biden Clan Judge Orders Fani Willis to Disclose All Correspondence with the January 6th Committee Wednesday Morning Rant Mid-Morning Art Thread The Morning Report — 12/4/24 Daily Tech News 4 December 2024 Overnight Open Thread - 12/03/2024 [Roger Ball] Mission Impossible Cafe Quick Hits Absent Friends Bandersnatch 2024 GnuBreed 2024 Captain Hate 2023 moon_over_vermont 2023 westminsterdogshow 2023 Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022 Dave In Texas 2022 Jesse in D.C. 2022 OregonMuse 2022 redc1c4 2021 Tami 2021 Chavez the Hugo 2020 Ibguy 2020 Rickl 2019 Joffen 2014 AoSHQ Writers Group A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published. Contact OrangeEnt for info: maildrop62 at proton dot me Cutting The Cord And Email Security Cutting The Cord [Joe Mannix (not a cop)] Cutting The Cord: It's Easier Than You Think [Blaster] Private Email and Secure Signatures [Hogmartin] Moron Meet-Ups	« Please Don't Out Personal/Private Information About Anyone, Even Trolls \| Main \| Sarah Silverman, Still Occasionally Funny » November 29, 2005 Letting A Smile Be Your Umbrella, And Other Ways To Get Yourself Dead The peace group to which the four kidnapped westerners announces on its website: CPT does not advocate the use of violent force to save lives of its workers should they be kidnapped, held hostage, or caught in the middle of a conflict situation. In related news, my local 7-11 has a sign announcing, "Warning: Safe contains a hell of a lot more than $50, the cashier definitely does know the combination (and don't let her tell you otherwise!), and incidentally has a hell of a body on her to boot." Or at least it used to have that sign. After every single item was looted from it, the place was bought for dimes on the dollar by a guy who put up this sign: May not look like much, but at least he's still in business. Via Instapundit, who has his own policy. posted by Ace at 11:15 PM \| Access Comments <script language="javascript" src="http://adserver.adtechus.com/addyn/3.0/5235/1131537/0/170/ADTECH;loc=700;cookie=info;target=_blank;key=key1+key2+key3+key4;grp=[group]"></script><noscript><a href="http://adserver.adtechus.com/adlink/3.0/5235/1131537/0/170/ADTECH;loc=300;key=key1+key2+key3+key4;grp=[group]" target="_blank"><img src="http://adserver.adtechus.com/adserv/3.0/5235/1131537/0/170/ADTECH;loc=300;key=key1+key2+key3+key4;grp=[group]" border="0" width="300" height="250"></a></noscript>	Recent Comments Yudhishthira's Dice: "There are videos of women being offered one bitcoi ..." OneEyedJack: "The MOST expensive thing to buy is a trophy wife. ..." Smell the Glove: "Good to see Hegseth punch back. Tit caused the res ..." bonhomme[/i][/i][/i][/b][/b][/b][/s][/s][/s][/u][/u][/u]: "Justice Sotomayor uses the term, "you people" to r ..." Sponge - Fck Cancer: "[i]Besides the White House getting a deep cleaning ..." ShainS -- Make Retribution Great Again! [/b][/i][/s][/u] : " @politvidchannel BREAKING: GOP senator Rand Paul ..." Axeman: " 7 year olds wish they were Cookie Monster. What i ..." Mike Hammer, etc., etc.: "Yeah, couldn't watch the WH vids. All that was mis ..." ...: "Rand Paul will never forgive Trump for calling him ..." Cheri: "Besides the White House getting a deep cleaning be ..." tubal: "Rand Paul is the poster boy of why to not be Liber ..." Boron Cobbie - leftists, remember Trump would be out soon if you hadn't stolen 2020: "Rand was the guy who had his ribs broken by someon ..." Recent Entries Dank Brandon's Bewildered African Adventure White House Once Again Turned Into Eyebleeding Gay Meth-Hallucination Nightmare by White Trash Delaware Hillbilly Biden Clan Judge Orders Fani Willis to Disclose All Correspondence with the January 6th Committee Wednesday Morning Rant Mid-Morning Art Thread The Morning Report — 12/4/24 Daily Tech News 4 December 2024 Overnight Open Thread - 12/03/2024 [Roger Ball]* Mission Impossible Cafe Quick Hits Search Search this site: Polls! Polls! Polls! Frequently Asked Questions What is the Deal with the Cowbell? Why is the Ace of Spades called "the Death Card"? The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick Primary Document: The Audio Paul Anka Haiku Contest Announcement Integrity SAT's: Entrance Exam for Paul Anka's Band AllahPundit's Paul Anka 45's Collection AnkaPundit: Paul Anka Takes Over the Site for a Weekend (Continues through to Monday's postings) George Bush Slices Don Rumsfeld Like an Fckin' Hammer Top Top Tens Democratic Forays into Erotica New Shows On Gore's DNC/MTV Network Nicknames for Potatoes, By People Who Really* Hate Potatoes Star Wars Euphemisms for Self-Abuse Signs You're at an Iraqi "Wedding Party" Signs Your Clown Has Gone Bad Signs That You, Geroge Michael, Should Probably Just Give It Up Signs of Hip-Hop Influence on John Kerry NYT Headlines Spinning Bush's Jobs Boom Things People Are More Likely to Say Than "Did You Hear What Al Franken Said Yesterday?" Signs that Paul Krugman Has Lost His Frickin' Mind All-Time Best NBA Players, According to Senator Robert Byrd Other Bad Things About the Jews, According to the Koran Signs That David Letterman Just Doesn't Care Anymore Examples of Bob Kerrey's Insufferable Racial Jackassery Signs Andy Rooney Is Going Senile Other Judgments Dick Clarke Made About Condi Rice Based on Her Appearance Collective Names for Groups of People John Kerry's Other Vietnam Super-Pets Cool Things About the XM8 Assault Rifle Media-Approved Facts About the Democrat Spy Changes to Make Christianity More "Inclusive" Secret John Kerry Senatorial Accomplishments John Edwards Campaign Excuses John Kerry Pick-Up Lines Changes Liberal Senator George Michell Will Make at Disney Torments in Dog-Hell Greatest Hitjobs The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny More Margaret Cho Abuse Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed" Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means Wonkette's Stand-Up Act Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report! Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet The House of Love: Paul Krugman A Michael Moore Mystery (TM) The Dowd-O-Matic! Liberal Consistency and Other Myths Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate "Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long) The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) Syndicate this site (XML) Powered by Movable Type 2.64

Letting A Smile Be Your Umbrella, And Other Ways To Get Yourself Dead