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November 08, 2005

Hatfields and McCoys, 21st Century Version

Ah, feuds.
Have you ever found yourself going tit-for-tat with some idiot, when you know it will probably only make things worse?
Have you ever expended time and energy into demonstrating that you are the bigger jerk, because, well, it would give you great pleasure to piss that guy off?
Me neither.

As neighbor disputes go, the one between Alekson and Dow on Meadow View Drive has dragged on for so long it resembles a geo-political conflict.

Soon after Alekson moved into his house, his neighbor started calling the police and other town official on him for every infraction under the sun.

On Oct. 29, Dow, who lives at 35 Meadow View Drive, called the police, the town manager and the mayor at home in the middle of the night to complain that people were urinating on the lawn at Alekson's Halloween party.
The police, who are obviously members of a corrupt Global Urination Conspiracy, determined that it was not actually against the law to allow drunks to urinate on your own F'n lawn in the middle of the night.
He's even reported Alekson to the building department because Alekson parks his pickup truck with commercial lettering in the driveway, a fine punishable by $88 a day.
God, I hate Connecticut sometimes. People have tried to explain this to me, but for the rest of my life I will never understand how a work vehicle = blight.

But in defense of Mr. Dow's prickly nature, his young neighbor does have a brace of plastic pink flamingos on his lawn. Inexcusable.

So Mr. Dow went to considerable expense, and erected an eight-foot fence on his property to relieve his vision of this horrid suburban bourgeois devilry.

So Alekson obligingly mounted the flamingos on top of nine foot poles.

The two parties are in mediation and the healing process is underway.

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posted by Laura. at 09:51 PM

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