Dorkwad Thread

This was the flame war thread. Now it's the dorkwad thread.

Stuff about VonKreedon's dorkiness after the jump.

285. vonKreedon - 3/21/2001 3:31:37 PM

I never like D&D much, for the very reasons shown in Ace's screenplay, too much being bound by rolling a half-dozen different obscure dice and being tied to being Good/Evil/Chaos/Order bullshit. I don't know if it was the D&D game system or just the geeks who played it, but the games all seemed to feel like Ace's screenplay.

My preferred role playing system is GURPS (Generic Universal Role Playing System). It seems to lend itself more to a story telling game form rather than a rigid structural game. Also, you could run a game in any context one could think of.

286. AceofSpades - 3/21/2001 3:32:26 PM

Good god. You ARE a geek, Vonkers.

I've been kidding this whole time... and yet you...

GURPS.

GURPS.

I... I don't know what to say.

291. AceofSpades - 3/21/2001 3:36:15 PM

[on the title for the thread]

I think we have a winner:

The thread will be called "VonKreedon's Magical GURPS Tales" until further notice.

296. AceofSpades - 3/21/2001 3:38:40 PM

[Explaining what GURPS is to someone who asks]

GURPS is a game like D&D.

However, even very superficially geeky people know about D&D.

You have to be a REAL geek to know about GURPS.

...

330. vonKreedon - 3/21/2001 4:14:26 PM

You see, I thought that GURPS sold out when they started coming out with all the specialty rule books. I mean, to me, the fabulous thing about GURPS was that it was universal, that you could take the basic concept and use it in any context. The specialty rules just made it more like D&D.

331. Indiana Jones [AKA Nick Kronos] - 3/21/2001 4:16:24 PM

I know what you mean. GURPS changed, man.

It used to be about the game, but then they changed. They really changed.

334. vonKreedon - 3/21/2001 4:18:16 PM

You Dork, it wasn't about the game, about winning and losing, it was about telling a story, a story that arose from the interaction of the players in the context created by the GM. It wasn't about the stupid game, it was about the connection between the players. Dork.

335. AceofSpades - 3/21/2001 4:19:06 PM

Ahhhh... the magical years.

Back when GURPS made a difference.

337. vonKreedon - 3/21/2001 4:20:00 PM

That's right, it GURPS used to stand for, or at least create the space for, a shared creative spirit; a community of chautaqua. As you say, now it's just another mass commodity sell out.

339. AceofSpades - 3/21/2001 4:21:37 PM

ONE-TWO-THREE-FOUR, we don't want your Orkish Wars!

FIVE-SIX-SEVEN-EIGHT, it's your supplements that we hate!

341. vonKreedon - 3/21/2001 4:23:06 PM

WHAT DO WE WANT! Shared creative story telling!
WHEN DO WE WANT IT! How about next Tuesday night?

345. AceofSpades - 3/21/2001 4:24:38 PM

I remember when "The Man" tried to force his Magical Compendium on us.

"Take your stinking capitalist Magical Compendium and stick it where the sun don't shine, Man!" I told him.

I spent six days in an Upstate New York jail for standing up to The Man.

What did I do with my time?

I created some WICKED character sheets, man.

HERE'S WHERE IT GETS REALLY GOOD...

347. vonKreedon - 3/21/2001 4:25:51 PM

Actually, a true fact, I was introduced to role playing while I was in the custody of the state of NH for occupying the Seabrook Nuke site.

349. AceofSpades - 3/21/2001 4:27:03 PM

"Actually, a true fact, I was introduced to role playing while I was in the custody of the state of NH for occupying the Seabrook Nuke site."

VonKreedon played the "role" of "Jailhouse Bitch."

350. AceofSpades - 3/21/2001 4:30:36 PM

Jailhouse Tough: "Okay, now I'm going to bend you over this bench and fuck the shit out of your ass."

VonKreedon: "Wait! Don't I get a combat reflexshes roll to avoid the assthault?!"

Jailhouse Tough: "Errrrrr... sure. Whatever. You have to roll an 18."

VonKreedon: "Damn! I only rolled a 17! Can I take half-damage, at leassht?"

Jailhouse Tough: "Uhhhhmmmm... no. Full damage. Bend over."

(Sounds of carnality and screams.)

VonKreedon: "Am I role-playing thish correctly?"

Jailhouse Tough: "Uhh... Oh... Ummmm... Oh, so sweet... Yeah, kid. You're role-playing it fine."

...

Jailhouse Tough: "Okay, I'm done. Who's next?"

Turk: "Me. I'm gonna get me some of that."

VonKreedon: "Wait! I get my combat reflexthes roll to thsave mythelf from the assthault! (rolls dice) An 18! I avoid the damage!"

Turk: "Uh, no. You don't get a combat, uh, combat--"

Tough: "Reflexes."

Turk: "Yeah, that's it. You don't get a combat reflexes roll this time."

VonKreedon: "Why not?"

Tough: "Uhhhhhhh... because... because you were 'stunned' by the previous attack."

(as Turk seizes VonKreedon's hips)

VonKreedon: "Boy oh boy! Thish sure isth a complicated game!"

A picture of Von Kreedon, taken shortly after his
release from the jail-slash-role-playing-club.
Notice his face is positively glowing.

posted by Ace at 01:17 PM

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