"Elderly Gay Man Dies; Was Also Prime Minister" | Main | Scarlett Johansson's Theory Of Filmmaking? Shut Up And Entertain
July 23, 2005

Kenyan Man Asks Bill Clinton For Chelsea's Hand In Marriage; Offers 20 Cattle And 40 Goats

And he vows to remain unmarried until Bill Clinton answers him.

I'll answer for him: Umm, no.

I mean, come on. This is his only daughter. He's not going to give her away for some livestock.

It's not like we're talking about something trivial like presidential pardons here.

In related news, Hillary's big-boned brothers have indicated they'd be willing to serve as male concubines in exchange for $100 gift certificates to Sizzler.


digg this
posted by Ace at 05:21 PM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
BackwardsBoy - #PurgeProgressivism[/i][/s][/b][/u]: "[i]Yeah, so I was right and some of you can eat sh ..."

Mike Hammer, etc., etc.: "When I did oilfield work, a lot of times the crew ..."

Huck Follywood: "fuck off asshole Posted by: Manco at August 21, 2 ..."

Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing: "Morning, 'rons and 'ronettes. Wish I were drink ..."

RedMindBlueState[/i][/s][/b][/u]: "[i]Anyhow, I see proper references of 'pelecypod' ..."

Anon a mouse: "Quick question BA*... Where did "muh resessssio ..."

Mike Hammer, etc., etc.: " How about mollusk. Posted by: J.J. Sefton ---- ..."

Huck Follywood: "Raimondo, the Oberlin College one, is in legal tro ..."

BackwardsBoy - #PurgeProgressivism[/i][/s][/b][/u]: "[i]When I did oilfield work, a lot of times the cr ..."

Brother Cavil, just so: "[i]Noted [x] Not Noted [_] Please Pass the Sweet ..."

Hikaru (Allie): "I still don't want media types being able to code. ..."

Village Idiot's Apprentice [/i]: ""[b] Yeah, so I was right[/b] and some of you can ..."

Recent Entries
Search


Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64