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June 10, 2005
Wouldn't "Bar-B-Q" Have Been More Appropriate? [John from WuzzaDem]
Houston Chronicle via (who else?) Drudge:
Potato-Chip Can Found In Place of Woman's Remains
When relatives of Vivian Shulman Lieberman went to visit her final resting place in a Houston mausoleum one year ago today, they discovered that the cedar chest containing her ashes was missing.
In its place, behind the locked, glass door of Lieberman's niche in Congregation Beth Israel's mausoleum, was a can of sour-cream-and-onion potato chips.
Hey, thanks for letting us know what flavor they were. A lesser journalist would have left us hanging.
"This is a first for me," said Robert Fells of the Virginia-based International Cemetery and Funeral Association.
He's obviously new. I'm sure the other ICFA members are calling him today:
"So, your first 'sour-cream-and-onion potato chip switcheroo, eh Rob? Yeah, I remember the first time that happened to me back in '67."
Marcelle Lieberman says she visited the niche that July and her sister visited in fall 2003.
The daughters say they returned to the mausoleum together on June 10, 2004, their father's birthday, and discovered the potato chip can in their mother's niche.
A locksmith opened the niche and Houston police took custody of the can, which still contained potato chips.
That's right, someone wasted perfectly good potato chips. Sour cream and onion potato chips. Bastards.
"It is unknown at this time whether this was an individual episode," [Robert Hilder, attorney for the family] said, "or if that is a snapshot to wider problems."
What kind of "wider problems" is he talking about? What do they expect to find in the other niches - Cheetos? Chex Mix? Honey Roasted Peanuts?
Gotta go, I'm hungry.