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April 08, 2005

Let's Be Honest: Michelle Malkin Is a C**t

Of course I'm not serious. Michelle Malkin is one of the dearest friends I have, despite the fact that I know her not at all. But she's famous and she seems to humor me, so she joins Ice-T and "Coco" in the exalted pantheon of Ace of Spades pretend-friends.

But commenters at the Washington Monthly's "Political Animal" blog are quite serious.

The only real disagreement among them concerns whether Ms. Malkin is a "c**t" or merely a "whore."

I suppose I have little right to comment on the incivility on INTERNET, as I've done so much to advance it.

Still, I will say this. I do try to exercise some caution here. Partly for reasons of taste, partly so that the people who know me don't think I'm an absolute freak, and also partly because I'd like to, you know, sell advertising space here.

For more money than I'm getting now.

And it just seems to me that right-wing sites are discriminated in terms of advertising -- because we're "scary" to a lot of the liberal buffoons making ad-buys -- and because, for example, one of our readers might say something a bit nasty in the comments.

And yet lefty commenters can toss out the c-word all the doo-dah day without impacting the desirability of advertising on their sites.

Maybe I should stop calling Keith Olbermann a "fucking douchebag" and call him what I really think he hought to be called. Trust me, "douchebag" is really down on the list of curses I like. It's so cute and silly it's almost a term of endearment.

By the way, speaking of the priggishness of many liberals-- Michelle Malkin is a "whore," I'm guessing, because she, get this, wears lipstick and seems to care about how her hair looks when on TV.

My goodness, she might as well be peddling her ass on the street, the filthy slattern.

Not all women can have the natural beauty of a, say, Bella Abzug.

That's Why "Wonkette" (or Her Ghostwriters) Gets All the Attention: A perfectly idiotic posting on this matter.

I don't mean to be, you know, either misogynistic or homophobic. But could someone explain to liberal women and liberal gay men that exclamation points are not to be used as commonly as, say, commas?

And furthermore! Just throwing in exclamation points! Does not! In fact! Make a bad joke funny! Via some process of excessive, gushing! Punctuational alchemy!

Writing! In the breathless style! Of a Michale Musto gossip column! Or a thirteen year old girl! In her crush-diary! Is kinda fuckin' annoying!

You know what I mean?!

Don't Hook Up With Wonkette

You could wind up with a nasty dose of The Slammies.* And pennicillin will not cure you.

Thanks! For the tip! To James!

* "The Slammies" is a euphemism for the chronic condition of over-using the already-overused exclamation point. It derives from "Slammer," newspaper-jargon for the punctuation mark in question.

Learn somthin' new every day!

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posted by Ace at 12:37 PM

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