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April 01, 2005

Instapundit Spoof; Michelle Malkin Spoof

I realize many of you aren't as interested in Instapundit (also known as "Traffic Santa") as I am, but I think this is kinda funny.

The stuff about "It's a Pundit" not having opinions on important issues of the day... funny because it's true.

Hey, Instapundit: I don't have opinions on a lot of things, either. In fact, I usually don't have any idea what the hell I'm talking about at all.

Does that stop me from offering bold, moronic opinions? No, it does not. It's part of the job.

If you can't invent an opinion on the spot and speak authoritatively about matters you have no good idea about whatsoever, then what the hell are you doing blogging? If you can't offer passionate opinions you just developed three seconds ago, it's time to give up your blogger laminate.

Meanwhile, this Michell Malkin parody page seems to be coming at her from the left, but not too viciously, I think. As Michelle is kind enough to keep me on my blogroll, despite my filthy-dirty postings (Thank God she doesn't actually read this stupid site!), I hope she doesn't mind my linking this too much.

It's sorta funny, and, you know: the left has been so damn humorless for so damn long I sort of want to encourage them. Being a little less serious all the time might be beneficial for our political culture.

Finally... not a spoof, just a sad prediction. Blog audiences tend to be male, and futhermore tend to be horny little bastards, so it is sadly preordained that all 100 of the top bloggers in three years will be cute chicks who do video-blogging. Here's one of the first of many coming challenges to my no longer well-nigh inevitable rise to fame and fortune beyond measure.

Pretty soon all male bloggers -- and female bloggers, too, who are not vivaciously cute and flirty -- will be effectively blacklisted, and we'll have to blog through "fronts" of cute chicks who pretend they're doing all the blogging.

Sort of like Wonkette, I guess. I wonder-- does she need an intern?

I have seen my future, and my future is Ring Lardner.

Malkin parod via The Hotline's blog round-up by William Buetler (subscription required). Cute vblogger thanks to the depravedly-horny The Fat Kid, who's already informed me he's abandoning this site entirely to do all his commenting... elsewhere.

My Alternate Future Update: I guess I could just finally give in and become a full-time INTERNET Star Trek dork; I've certainly got the basic training.

Bbeck says this site is pretty dorky and therefore pretty funny, and she would know. She made out with Larry Niven, don't forget.

View the trailer for an episode called, ahem, "The Trassuarian Intersection."

Wow. A title like that really just sells the project. Puts me in the mind of traffic-jams.

But seriously-- how do these dorks have the money to build fairly decent-looking sets and do special effects?

Ohhhh... right.

Damnit, I knew I should have gone into computers in college. What the hell did I really think I was going to do with a degree in Elizabethan Erotic Poetry?


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posted by Ace at 01:41 PM

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