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January 08, 2005

Son of Nixon Despondent Over Aniston-Pitt Split

Me? I'm ecstatic. He's finally back on the market!

Update: Did I say "he"? I meant "she." Of course I meant "she."

Sure, Brad Pitt can just turn me into jelly with his witheringly blue eyes and his pecs sculpted by Rodan,* but Jennifer Anniston has...

Well, you know, whatever it is women have that makes them so, um, "hot." You know-- she's good a very keen eye for kitschy-cute handbags.

* You may think I mean the celebrated French neoclassical artist, but in fact I mean the giant Japanese bat-monster. He's a real talent, and has been featured prominently in several of Yoko Ono's highly-publicized but under-attended "installations."

posted by Ace at 02:29 PM

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You know-- she's good a very keen eye for kitschy-cute handbags. * You may think I mean the celebrated French neoclassical artist, but in fact I mean the giant Japanese bat-monster. He's a real talent, and has been featured prominently in several of Yoko Ono's highly-publicized but under-attended "installations." posted by Ace at 02:29 PM \| Access Comments <script language="javascript" src="http://adserver.adtechus.com/addyn/3.0/5235/1131537/0/170/ADTECH;loc=700;cookie=info;target=_blank;key=key1+key2+key3+key4;grp=[group]"></script><noscript><a href="http://adserver.adtechus.com/adlink/3.0/5235/1131537/0/170/ADTECH;loc=300;key=key1+key2+key3+key4;grp=[group]" target="_blank"><img src="http://adserver.adtechus.com/adserv/3.0/5235/1131537/0/170/ADTECH;loc=300;key=key1+key2+key3+key4;grp=[group]" border="0" width="300" height="250"></a></noscript>	Recent Comments JackStraw: ">>Yeah, right AfD wants safety and security for it ..." grammie winger - cheesehead: "He wasn't a Muslim, then? 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