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May 01, 2004
Micah Wright Is a Fucking LiarWho is Micah Wright, you ask? Good question -- he's a nobody. But he's a nobody who got a book contract based on his anti-war agitation and his claim that he knew the horrors of combat, having served in war as an Army Ranger. Here's Our Ranger Hero Micah in typical form: I've seen combat to "liberate" people before in Panama. Have you? Did you volunteer to fight for your country? I fucking doubt it. I especially doubt your leg ass ever made it through Airborne School and I KNOW for a fact that you wouldn't have survived one week of Ranger School. Except he wasn't a Ranger. He wasn't in war. Heck, he wasn't even actually in the actual Army-- he spent some time in ROTC. No matter how low you think the Hysterical Left has sunk, they've got this habit of consistently surprising you by sinking lower. And guess what the response is to his confession -- which, in all likelihood, comes two days before he was about to be outed? "I do know one thing. It took a lot, A LOT, of courage to come forward. " "This confession, if true, doesn't affect my feelings about your talent either way." "It took guts to confess. Good show." Courage. Guts. Well, it seems the fucking lying douchebag Micah Wright did learn something from all that time he didn't spend as an Army Ranger. Michele has more-- including all the links you know you've got to click on. Update! The lying douchebag says that all the stuff he claims in his foreward happened to him in the shit in Panama didn't actually happen to him... since he wasn't there. But he's proud to say all those things DID happen... to other people. Or so he's heard. It Just Gets Fuckin' Better and Better! Jim Treacher, of Mother May I Sleep With Treacher?, deadpans: I liked when the Washington Post reporter asked him if he'd ever killed anyone: "'That's one of those questions that I really don't like to answer,' he says after an uncomfortable pause. 'You're shooting at people and other people are shooting and people fall down. Put it this way: I never shot at anybody who hadn't shot at me first.'" None of which is technically untrue. Nope. Not technically untrue at all! Okay, enough of that! Pretty soon we'll just be reprinting everything on Michele's site. And... We just guessed that his "confession" conveniently comes two days before his exposure by someone else, and it turns out, of course, that we were right. REAL Rangers and Special Forces guys saw right through him, and were calling him a liar to his face (well, through email), and there were websites exposing him and even the press was getting hip to his lie. So, there's the "courage" of a leftist shitbag for you. It's Too Good To Stop Updating Now! In this Washington Post article profiling him as a world-weary warrior who's now waging peace, this nasty shit does his best Rambo impression: "I was highly intelligent but emotionally isolated," he writes, "perfect, I found out later, for the Special Forces." Yes! Perfect for the Special Forces! These days he focuses on creating video games and writing a comic book called "StormWatch: Team Achilles," which harks back to his Special Forces experiences. "It's left-wing pastiche masquerading as right-wing military fiction," he says. "It's a team of humans working for the United Nations who kill superheroes when they go out of control. Because it's a U.N. team, I get to bring politics into the book." Indeed! How thrilling it must be to read of his "Special Forces experiences," like getting a Vente moca frappachino at Starbucks, or "going behind enemy lines" to make color-copies at Kinko's! Next up: Ranger Micah uses his deadly Special Forces training, and Shaolin-kung-fu expertise, to buy some fucking stamps at the Post Office!
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